Our marriage has gone through this stage, it's simply terrible. My husband cheated and let go of his harsh words. Two years later, he divorced. The reason why he needed two years was because the child was young and couldn't bear to hurt him. My husband and I were college classmates, and we went through 7 years of love and marriage. My husband has a gentle temperament, and my personality deviates from him. He is quite dominant. When he gets along with me, everything is up to me. He once complained to me that he is too constrained and not free, and I didn't take it seriously. His tolerance made me feel very happy, but I didn't consider my husband's accumulated resentment towards me. Gradually, it wasn't until the day he cheated that I truly felt the arrival of the marital crisis.
After giving birth to the baby, our marital relationship was very disharmonious. I was very tired, especially when I came home from work, and my body was very tired. I could fall asleep when I lay down. The baby is taken care of by my mother-in-law, and I can freely control my time after work. Sleeping at night, he wants to get intimate with me. If he is interested, I will cooperate. If he is not interested, I will directly refuse. The more he pesters me, the more he dislikes me. When he lacks patience, he will scold him. Various reasons led to his infidelity. The other party is his subordinate, five years younger than him, and has developed a genuine relationship. The girl is willing to wait for my husband's divorce. My husband announced that the divorce will take place two years later when the child is four years old.
Seeing his firm gaze, I felt a panic in my heart. I reflected deeply, it was because I didn't care enough about him, it was because I was dominant, and it was because I didn't cooperate with him in living a married life. In short, I have said everything that needs to be said, with only one wish that he can turn back. During the conversation, I found that his heart couldn't come back and he was determined to leave this home. I am still trying to win his heart, and I told him that I can wait for him to change his mind. He looks indifferent. He took my child to see that woman. The three of them were like a family, and I was like an outsider, occupying a seat in the main room and refusing to let it go.
For me, marriage is a torment, too oppressive, and I still want to save it. Do you think there is still hope? Please help me come up with an idea.
Reply from Weiqing Consultant:
Hello. If your husband is cheating, the first choice is to have a profound review of yourself. Being aware of this, I admire your generosity. Although you are responsible for his infidelity, his behavior has already hurt you and your family, and the main fault is still with your husband, not you. Even if you attribute all your mistakes to yourself, he will not cherish your kindness and magnanimity because his heart is no longer with you. You have expressed your intention and can wait for him to change his mind, but he hasn't stopped at the cliff. Do you think this kind of man is still worth cherishing?
As a woman, you need to have your own stance. It is already a fact that your husband has cheated, and there is currently no sign of turning back. Your unprincipled indulgence towards him will only make him increasingly distant from you. Now that you haven't divorced, he loves his child. You can use your child as a bond in your relationship, or use the strength of your family to exchange his heart. If he still insists on acting alone, gather evidence of his infidelity, agree to a divorce, and protect his own interests to the best of his rights.