Post Date December, 02 2023
Marriage happiness is an important prerequisite for sexual health. According to a survey report by renowned gender expert Pan Suiming, many Chinese families are facing the threat of extramarital sex in their marriages, and at the same time, they have not chosen to divorce. After all, marriage is not easy, it requires careful management and cherishing.
In the revised Marriage Law in 2000, a new provision was made that "both spouses have the obligation to be loyal to each other". But the author found the following situation.
The questions in the three questionnaires were: Did your (current) lover have had sex with someone else during your sexual relationship? Even if it's only once.
In the 21st century, about 3% of Chinese couples still do not divorce despite knowing that they have extramarital sex; About 16% of couples suspect that the other party may have a divorce, and they have not yet divorced. By 2010, one fifth of existing marriages in China had already been threatened by extramarital sex. However, these couples still haven't divorced! Especially, this situation has significantly increased in the 21st century.
Famous Gender Expert: Pan Suiming
Is this whether Chinese couples are becoming increasingly indifferent to extramarital sex, or is it because marriage is becoming increasingly difficult to dissolve, forcing at least one party to "tolerate it"? Are they learning how to get along with suspicion, or are they still unwilling or haven't learned to use divorce as one of the ways to solve problems?
Unfortunately, the research method of questionnaire survey cannot answer the above questions. But the author can at least say that the statement that "extramarital sex will inevitably destroy marriage" circulating in society does not apply to these one-fifth of couples because they have not divorced as of the time of investigation.
In the foreseeable future, the proportion of extramarital affairs between Chinese couples appears to be increasing. But all the public opinion condemning it has not pondered a simple question: why does one in five Chinese couples still not divorce even though they have suspected the other party of having an extramarital affair?
In this regard, the mass media can tell us countless stories, but ignore one basic fact: if Chinese couples want to divorce now, it is still too difficult; It's not the difficulty of legal procedures, but the many concerns in real life, not only the issue of property division, but also a series of emotional high costs such as mental trauma, marital relationships, and remarriage depreciation. Especially the national policy of having only one child not only intensifies the competition between couples for existing children, but also largely eliminates the possibility of both parties having children again. Therefore, at least one fifth of marriages are actually pursuing a life philosophy of "stability over everything".
This is a historical regression of pure essence. At least one in five couples actually negates the basic principle of modern society that the Chinese people chose a hundred years ago, which is "love is the soul of marriage".
Of course, the freedom and convenience of divorce in real life require numerous social conditions and the efforts of citizens, and I do not intend to discuss it. But the logical fact is that once an extramarital affair occurs, one will either divorce or be divorced. The more such situations occur, the less extramarital affairs there will be.
Therefore, all social forces that suppress divorce are objectively promoting an increase in extramarital affairs. As for whether this is to consolidate comprehensive social repression, it is only clear to them in their own hearts.
