Post Date December, 03 2023
It's because many people never prepare themselves well. Even if the right person (woman) appears one day, you won't be able to keep them. Another reason why we are having a difficult relationship today is that many people always focus on the wrong time slot.
Time error type A
There are people who are full of thoughts about their predecessors. Perhaps it's because I miss his kindness, perhaps I have a deep unwillingness to be abandoned at that time, or perhaps I regret not taking advantage of the opportunity in the past. In short, emotions of remembrance, regret, or sadness always dominate their entire thoughts.
Have these people never met new people again?
Usually, there are also, but because one is overly immersed in the past, it is easy to compare new people with old ones.
He wouldn't have said such brainless things before
But love is not a comparative issue. The old man may have better qualities, but he certainly has his own problems; If there were no problems, we wouldn't have gone our separate ways at that time. It's just that many people always over beautify their past memories, only remembering the perfect part of the old person in their eyes, and forgetting the problems that caused the two to not get along well. Just constantly trying to find the shadow of the past from the present.
But this is actually unfair to others. Because you shouldn't build your own regrets on others. And such comparisons often only bring complaints. Complaining too much often leads to feelings fading, and in the end, the new couple may run away again. If the newcomer is really bad, that's okay. But many people have to wait until they lose before they start to miss the good things at that time.
He was really good to me at the time
Wait until the new person becomes the past, and nostalgia begins to take over and regret the things that have been lost. This is equivalent to living in remembrance and the past repeatedly.
Let yourself break free from this tragic emotional cycle! The regret of the past may be heartbreaking, but it is ultimately a part of life's past. Please don't compare your next relationship to the past, after all, everyone is an independent existence, and there is always something unique about each person. If the advantages meet your expectations, please turn a blind eye to other small details that are not perfect enough. Don't repeatedly compare it with the memories you've missed, don't keep looking at things you don't have, and don't keep dwelling on regrets in your heart. Let go of the past, clear your memories, and focus on the present. Only then will good things begin to accumulate.
Time error type B
Living in the past is a problem. Another problem is to focus too much on the future.
Some people have aspirations, expectations, and dreams for the future, and in order to achieve those goals, they work too hard or even plan to sacrifice the present in exchange for future dreams. For example, I am committed to making money, saving, paying a mortgage, and raising a child, so I struggle until the sky and earth are dark, giving up all the interpersonal relationships around me - frugal and sacrificing myself, and even sacrificing everything for my partner. The saying goes: 'Let's endure hardship now, and when we have money in the future, we can do whatever we want.'.
I'm not saying that people don't need to save, nor am I asking you to give up fighting. But whether it's saving money, buying a house, or raising a child, it doesn't mean sacrificing all the present. After all, life is unpredictable. Natural and man-made disasters happen in a flash, and the future may not come at all. Who knows how long we can spend with the people we love? What kind of wish you have in the future may be a promise that will never be fulfilled. In that case, balance a bit and leave some resources and effort for the present. This is a thoughtful and also a responsibility towards one's partner.
In addition, don't forget that if your future is to be stable, it actually depends on getting along every moment of today. The current memory is not good, everyone's only memory is to shrink their clothes and diet, just avoid wasting every day, just gather less and leave more. In the future, even if we save enough money, pay off loans, and raise children, the two of us will have no memories, no topics, and no idea how to get along sweetly. What is the meaning of such a future?
So, a good partnership should actually invest more in the present and have more beautiful memories of the present. Don't just worry about the future, focus solely on your career, and forget to manage your current life. True happiness is being with family, a joyful memory of every day, and the laughter and love between people. If you don't have these sacrifices, even if you fight to become a supervisor, buy a house, or make a lot of money, but no one shares them with you, what's the point of these sacrifices?
Conclusion
So, please don't bury yourself in reminiscing about the past and hoping for the future, but forget to manage the present. After all, the present is actually the most worthwhile place for us to invest our efforts. If we don't manage it seriously now, after a period of time, it will actually become a regret of the past and prevent the expected future from happening at all
