On the way back to my residence during work, I stumbled upon my boyfriend and hometown wife in bed

I have been with my boyfriend for twelve years. Eight years ago, I went to work in XX and he didn't trust me for a month. He came to see me from his hometown! I agreed with him to find him a job and not go back.

During this period, I met a fellow villager who lived very close to us. My boyfriend didn't work, so he went to his house every day to play. His wife took her daughter to work at five o'clock, and he finished work at eight o'clock every day. So, when he came to his house, he talked to his wife. I finish work at 8 pm and in a few days, he will take me to someone else's house to play. That's all, we can have dinner together when we have time. My boyfriend only found a job for almost a month!

I paid him all my salary, but I don't know what he did. He spent over 2000 yuan on me in one month, and then I gave it to him for another month. My boyfriend had a day off the previous day, and I took care of her children to wash clothes, treating them like my own. I don't know when it started, but I feel like my boyfriend and that woman are not right. Because I didn't find any tricks, I told my boyfriend to avoid going to other people's places.

That's it. We've been living together for almost three years, and I've moved! The place where they moved is very close to where they work. The woman took her daughter over to play after work. We didn't live together for over a year, and I didn't get in touch with them very much. During the Chinese New Year, I heard that their husband and wife have returned to their hometown. On the evening of March 7, 2013, the woman called me and said that they came over from their hometown to play at my house. He asked me for my boyfriend's phone number, and I didn't think much about it before giving it to her!

The next day at around ten o'clock, she arrived at my workplace and I took their mother and daughter to my house. That day, my boyfriend was resting, and I asked her if she had called my boyfriend yet? She said she hit several times! I brought it home and she said she would play at home and cook for me in the afternoon, so I went to work. Then I got restless at work and came home in four hours. When I opened the door, I found my boyfriend lying on the bed with his bare buttocks covered, and the woman's hair was messy. Seeing my face turn red immediately.

I saw that scene and couldn't pick me up, so I slapped my boyfriend twice and asked the woman what they were doing? She said my boyfriend took off his pants and hugged her not to let her go. I said you're not stupid, he's like that. Why don't you stay at my house? Then I asked her to take off her pants and take a look. My boyfriend was very excited at the time and broke my head with a bowl! I couldn't call her husband over. He was so old that I wanted to hit her in front of him, so he knelt down for me and asked me to forgive his wife. Later on, he told me that he had no sexual ability. I saw her husband as very honest, so I didn't look for them.

The next day, I felt dizzy and went to the hospital to see if I had high blood lipids! I came back from being hospitalized for half a month, and I didn't argue with him. It was like nothing had happened. After six months of this, when he told me why he did it, he never explained it to me. I feel like we're okay. Is it because I didn't do it well? He's the one who did it that way. I keep asking and asking, and he told me they've been together for a long time, and they've had three relationships. But in my heart, we've been together for five years, and her husband can't do it. My boyfriend is willing to be with her, woman? From physical contact, I feel that he's different from before, and later I saw it with my own eyes, and I finally found out the truth, I am so sad and heartbroken.

Because they are the villagers I trust the most, they hurt me with my trust in them. I can't accept it, and there are also men who are promiscuous. They can steal to find Miss, which is venting. But after being together for so long, they will have feelings and hurt two families. They said they couldn't control it twice, but they didn't think about it after doing it? Have you ever felt guilty and blamed yourself? We have been apart for three years now, and I feel a knot in my heart. I often suffer from insomnia and feel extremely depressed.

I just want to know, why did he treat me like this? I really can't figure it out, I don't know if desire is greater than reason, or if reason is greater than desire. I've spent a lot of money, but my colleagues say that my mind seems to be out of whack. I've consulted many psychologists, and they say I'm just under too much pressure!

But I don't know the result. What if I can't let it go? I'm in great pain now. Why are they doing that in my house? Do they know that I can come home anytime I go to work? Why not go outside and not to her house? Don't let me see it with my own eyes. I thought to myself that they must have been together a lot because the woman returned to her hometown for more than 20 days. They were too eager to control it, right? I want him to tell me the truth, whatever it is, or if my ideas are incorrect, I can speak up.

Can you help me? I once thought about dying with him, forget it. It's not easy for us to be together. We started out very hard, and I never gave up. I can't figure out how he changed so quickly? We've been apart for a long time, and I'm afraid they'll be together again! I love and hate him, and sometimes I want to kill him. I am willing to go to prison, don't they have any conscience?

reply:

1. Many times, women are like this. In relationships, especially when marriage ends in failure, they always ask why? I hope to get an answer, and even cannot get out of that shadow. In fact, when a result is already in front of you, when you encounter harm from the other party, is it meaningful to ask more why? Is that answer really unclear to you in your heart? It's not true, it's just that you dare not face all of this yourself.

2. As far as you are concerned, you and your ex boyfriend have been together for twelve years, and the relationship is not deep. However, in the end, they did not achieve good results, and instead, they made it difficult for you to get out of that vortex after breaking up with him for three years. This shows that this relationship has a great impact on you. In fact, you really need to see a good psychologist. If you don't take timely and effective adjustment, your heart can easily lead to particularly extreme thoughts due to your extreme emotions.

3. In fact, you really don't need to hold onto your past and not let go. Although the emotional experience this man brings to you revolves around you like a nightmare, after all, it's over now. He may not have been as good as you imagined from the beginning, and he is not worth your nostalgia at all. He should have disappeared from your world long ago, but it was because you expected too much of him and indulged him too much, which led to the unbearable situation later on. What you need to reflect on is yourself, to mature your inner and mental state, rather than just asking how the other person is doing. The other person is just an ungrateful scumbag, and what can you do? What can you change him? Actually, it's just a matter of our own judgment. Let's summarize our mistakes and failures, why keep staring at him.

4. In fact, what you are currently concerned about is not that ex boyfriend, but rather your inability to face your emotional failure. Faced with such an outcome, you cannot understand or be reconciled. For this, you cannot step out of yourself. I really don't want to get into that bull's horn again. Such a scumbag, let him go as far as he can. Don't contact him again, even if he turns around and pleads with you, I hope you don't give him another chance. It doesn't matter who he wants to be with anymore. What you need to do is to give yourself positive energy, make more positive friends, stop interacting with your fellow countryman, and be cautious in making friends in the future. Let your mindset be positive and optimistic, and don't think about extreme thoughts. Let go of your sinking revenge mentality, and stop thinking about silly thoughts about the other person's death. You should know that death is the easiest, life is the hardest. Only by living well can you and your family have a good future and hope. Don't do foolish things, and don't punish yourself with the mistakes of others anymore. Work hard, live well, adjust your mindset, and find someone who truly loves you and who you love. That's what you need to do most right now.