Post Date December, 03 2023
We have been married for 15 years and have two daughters. "I am 5 years older than my husband, but we have a good emotional foundation and are in a free love relationship. At the beginning, the economic conditions were not good, and we worked together and worked hard. Now we have a much better life than the people around us. He can let me stay at home as a full-time wife. He said that as long as I am happy, he is willing to do so.". Apart from smoking, he basically has no bad habits. Every day, except for working (as a doctor in a private clinic), we go home, and even when friends gather, we are all family oriented. He also dotes on me. Although I am older than him, he is very humble to me. I know he is a good man, and I am proud of having such a husband. I love him very much and can help him at work. In life, I can take care of things at home and outside in an orderly manner, without him worrying, and I can also cook delicious meals for him.
However, my temper is not very good, perhaps because I am too strong and angry, or perhaps because I am a few years older than him. My sense of inferiority is getting heavier and heavier, and I am afraid that he will dislike me. Everything has to follow my heart before I feel secure and realize that he loves me. He used to comfort and coax me, but now he seems tired of it. "When I'm not happy, he doesn't bother to talk to me anymore. He often quarrels about small things. He used to let me go after quarrels, and soon we made up.". "But now that he's not like this, we've learned the Cold War. What's more frightening is that a few days ago, during our argument, he seemed crazy and even smashed the TV, computer, and dining table. Was it my unwillingness to let him do this?"? As for this?
"I was very aggrieved, but for the sake of the child, for the sake of the family, and even more for him, I later replaced all the things he smashed with new ones. I wanted to forget that moment, but later on, he didn't seem to feel guilty about his actions, nor was he moved by my submission.". He is still indifferent to me, which makes me very sick. The night before yesterday, when we were confused about our theory, he left home and went to the clinic to stay. I didn't stop him. "I haven't been to the clinic to help these two days (and sometimes I don't go to the clinic when I'm not angry). I think we should all calm down, but I don't know what our marriage will look like after it cools down."? Can we continue? Is there any need to continue?
Ms. Chen:
"You can take care of things at home and abroad in an orderly manner, without worrying about him, and can cook delicious meals for him. You can also help his career a bit. You are indeed a very good wife, but if you do not do everything willingly, you will accumulate higher and higher expectations for him. Subconsciously, you feel that I have paid so much for you, and you deserve to let me go, and everything must comply with my wishes.". Plus, you're five years older than him, and your inner insecurity makes you want to rely on his commitment to you to confirm whether he still cares about you as much as he did.
The more you want him to follow you, the greater the pressure on him will be. At first, he is willing to maintain it. Over time, his heart is tired, and over time, he will also explode. What he wants is for you to put down your figure and get along with him equally, instead of being aloof and following you and circling you every day like a princess. The more your heart cares about the fact that you are five years older than him, the easier it is for this fact to creep into your relationship. Only if you ignore this factor and get along like a normal husband and wife can your relationship be equal.
It's right to calm down for a while. You can take this opportunity to reflect, but let's not cool down. You ask if it is necessary to continue. Your relationship has a deep relationship and a happy family. This setback is only a test, not enough to justify your parting ways. You can fully use this test to repair or even upgrade your relationship, and the key lies in how you face it.
