My husband has been promoted, which is a worthy celebration for our family. When we got married, he worked for this company and spent five years together. He also stayed in the company for five years. With five years of work experience, he is a senior figure, and now his promotion and salary increase are considered a good thing. As a leader, I inevitably feel a bit restless. He often does irrational things, which gives me a headache. Previously, I used to think that my husband was an honest and hardworking man who never wavered in his thoughts. However, now as a senior management, it seems that years of pent up resentment have erupted. After everyone else, he looks like a leader, which makes me disgusted.
I noticed that he was becoming increasingly restless, often going in and out in romantic situations, constantly surrounded by women with different postures. After work, he used to stay at home playing games, watching TV, or helping me with household chores. But recently he hasn't been able to sit still at home at all. Either running out for a drink, or chatting endlessly at home. I also commute to and from work with him. After I get home, cooking, washing, drying, mopping, and other things surround me. He lies on the sofa, giggling at his phone, and there is no busy me in his eyes.
I couldn't bear it anymore and my temper broke out. Accuse him of being idle all day, only knowing how to have fun after work, and not helping me share some of it, wasting all his time on outsiders. Do we still have to live this life. Seeing me angry, he didn't react. I forcefully took his phone and saw him flirting with many women on WeChat. Earlier, I heard that my husband was fooling around with a few unscrupulous women, but I didn't believe it. Now it seems that others haven't wronged him. I pointed at his phone and cursed him, asking if he was ashamed.
He unexpectedly dragged me over and retorted, "This is a job requirement. It's easy to communicate with clients by making more of these women. These days, there are not many people who don't like to play, and business is all discussed at the table." Finally, he taught me that everything should be flexible. Previously, it was because he was too rigid that he was promoted so slowly. Now that he has mastered the method of dealing with people, he doesn't worry about not earning money in the future.
His words left me speechless. I solemnly told him that being caught by your handle, no matter how hard you try and touch my bottom line, I will make it difficult for you. He promised me with his hands folded that he wouldn't act recklessly. A few days later, I noticed the scene of him coming out of the hotel with a strange woman. On the day I got home, I had a brainstorming experience. My husband said I didn't understand him and had sex with other women. He even made me understand him. I was so angry with him that I slammed the door and returned to my mother's house. We don't have children, and the divorce should be easy to handle, but I just can't make up my mind and say goodbye to him. I don't know what I think in my own heart. Please help me with some guidance. c'mon.
Reply from Weiqing Consultant:
As the saying goes, 'three years of good study and three days of bad study' are what men need, vanity and face. Since your husband's promotion, subtle changes have begun to occur. He regards flirtation with women as a means of work, believing that only by making friends with these women at the table can his work be helpful. In his mind, it has been defined as "business is negotiated at the table". He disregards the wickedness of his actions, indulges in such occasions, and has lost interest and responsibility for you, for his family. The impulsive behavior you are making now poses a threat to him.
For this kind of man, you need to have favorable evidence for you. At this moment, his career is on the rise, and the most taboo issue is reputation damage. A good lifestyle is a leader's authority in front of subordinates. So, analyzing the problem from this perspective allows him to recognize his mistakes, change his perspective on life, actively admit his mistakes, and based on his attitude change, make the next steps.