Post Date December, 03 2023
Hello! My husband and I have been married for 16 years, and have a couple of children. Life is very happy, but the good times are not long. Recently, I found that my husband is not right. My sixth feeling tells me that my husband betrayed our feelings. Coincidentally, I accidentally read his QQ chat records, such as the thunderbolt. For so many years, he has been cheating on me to provoke women outside, and it is not fixed. My heart is bleeding, and I have never suspected him. Because he is very kind to me and responsible for his family and children. I also love him deeply. I don't have the courage to tell him about it, but I think about it every day. I can't concentrate on it after work and rest. I have lost weight recently. I also want to divorce, but what about the children? As soon as I saw the resentment in my husband's heart, I couldn't say it. We were classmates, deskmates, married early, and friends envied us. But who knows how I feel now, our life is also better than before. With a house and a car, can all rich men become bad? My husband also told me that he would never leave me at any time. Never thought of divorce with me. My mind is very contradictory. Please give me some advice. What should I do?
Doctor of Psychology:
Hello! I really understand your mood now. It's hard not to say, and it's afraid to hurt each other's feelings. But you can't bear the pain alone. I suggest you talk to your husband gently to see what's wrong with your marriage. Communication is very important. I hope you can communicate frankly. Generally, men and women have ambiguous words and deeds, which may be seeking stimulation, but also some are love addiction syndrome or behavioral addiction syndrome.
If he has feelings and intimate behavior with a single woman, it may be that he is right with him. From your description, his relationship with multiple women may not necessarily have deep feelings with them. I didn't really want to divorce you, but this kind of behavior will really hurt you. I understand your mood now. Your emotional foundation is very good. I suggest you calm down and think about it carefully. Do you usually care about him enough? Or is sex life unsatisfied?
There are three main reasons for extramarital affairs: emotional demands, unsatisfied intramarital sex, and material temptation. First, reflect on whether your marriage has these problems. If you swallow your breath, you can only make yourself more painful and resentful. The unintentional killing is the most powerful. Maybe he doesn't know your pain. Love needs to be expressed, and pain needs to be told. If you feel that you can't face it and don't know how to communicate, you can also seek the help of professional psychological counseling.
