Post Date December, 03 2023
[Question]
When my daughter was just promoted to the first year of junior high school, my husband was promoted, but he was sent to another city to work. It has been nearly seven years since my husband and wife moved to another city.
At first, it was okay, but in the past three years, he didn't want to cohabit with me, nor did he want to go home, nor did he want to chat with me. He was very cold to me, very disgusted with me, and I felt like he had a mistress outside. He said he didn't. I request to live in his city and take care of him there. He is extremely unwilling and quite disgusted, afraid of me coming over.
Last month, it was discovered that he had a mistress outside. Only then did he admit that he had met her two years ago and only lived together in July this year, with the mistress constantly taking care of her daily life.
At this point, I am still willing to forgive him. As long as he breaks up with Xiao San and returns to this family, I will still live with him regardless of past grievances. Because I still have feelings for him and love him. I don't want to lose him, I don't want to open this house, but he is very determined to divorce me and give me a compensation fee after the divorce, but it's not a one-time payment, it's a small amount every month, and it will be paid over ten years.
Who knows what will happen in ten years? I am very tired now, and it is impossible for him to turn around. If he can give me the compensation fee in one go, I am willing to let go of him and start over. After that, I will not have any connection with him. But he made it clear to me that he didn't have the money and couldn't give me the compensation at once. What should I do? Deep down, I am unwilling to divorce, but the compensation fee cannot be given to me at once. He and I also have a daughter who is in the first year of high school and studies in the city where he works. She is currently unaware that his father has a mistress outside. Could you please tell me what to do? Is this marriage a divorce or not? What should I do if I don't get divorced? What should I do if I get divorced?
Answer
For a long time, Xiao San has become a closer existence to him, and this man has become ruthless and meaningless towards you and his daughter. It is impossible for them to start cohabiting in July this year, as he said. Since he firmly opposed you going elsewhere, the two have moved from underground to formal.
When a family begins to experience apathy, it must be taken seriously enough. Overcoming it will definitely lead to the incurable condition of this apathy. The intimacy and harmony between couples cannot be influenced by any factors such as distance or personnel. At the end of the family, both parties have responsibilities. Now, it's up to you to decide whether to divorce and split up, or to cheer up and fight against the mistress. Regardless of the choice, experts can intervene and help you. Be sure to ensure your future life. Middle-aged couples often face minor crises. Be strong and not be influenced by your husband's decisions. Think carefully about what you hope for before taking the next step.
