Life is not happy after pregnancy, my husband is not considerate, making me fantasize about spiritual derailment

My husband and I ended up without love for him because we didn't have sex.

My husband and I were introduced to each other and fell in love. We haven't had any love experiences before. Until we met my husband, I didn't know what love is. We cried for the one we love and laughed for the one we love. "Because I wasn't married, I didn't want to have sex with him, so he got angry with me. He said he couldn't stand it, and if he couldn't be with him, he would break up. Finally, I agreed to be with him, and finally we got married.".

Their family doesn't have much money, and my parents didn't want any money for me to be happy in the future. In their hearts, as long as I can be happy, they don't want their money. My husband is an only child, and he doesn't worry about anything at home. His parents do everything on his behalf. When we first got married, we also had a period of happy (sexual) days, until after I became pregnant, I didn't feel happy anymore.

After getting married, my parents said that when I grow up and get married, I need to be like an adult. When I go to my mother-in-law's house, I need to work hard and make them like me. Later on, when I became pregnant, I often vomited during pregnancy and couldn't do anything, resulting in conflicts in my family. When I got married, I did everything from washing clothes to cooking and cleaning, just to make them like me. When I fell in love with my husband, my mother-in-law didn't like me, so I wanted them to like me a little more after getting married. My husband hasn't done any housework since we got married. My mother said he only needs to work and I have nothing to do at home. It's okay to do more work. "I don't want my husband to work too hard, so I didn't let him do the housework until I was about to have a baby, and in the middle, I had conflicts with them and ate separately.". I forgot to say, we all live in the same building, mother-in-law, they live on the second floor, and we live on the fourth floor.

Every year, my heart gets colder and colder every day. I told him that at the end of the day, I won't care about you anymore, and our marriage will almost come to an end. The saddest thing is that I even lost 15 pounds at work, and my health is poor. The virus has infected me in the hospital, but he still doesn't care about me. When I was hospitalized, his parents came to see me, or my mother-in-law said he went there twice. "In hospital, I need to apply some medicine, and my mother-in-law gave me all the medicine. He also said that I had not done anything good. If I had done something good, could I have been hospitalized?"!!!

Since then, my heart has been cold to him. My heart has no sustenance, and there are only children. I have been fantasizing about spiritual infidelity, and I know I will have to apologize to him sooner or later. I talked to him and told him not to play anymore, to work well, and to live well. He's still like that. "Later, I had food poisoning and illness, and he hurt me again. I was completely cold to him, and then I went to do business with my parents.".

After I left, he had dinner with his parents, and the child's mother-in-law took it with him. My mother-in-law couldn't work anymore. I worked here and he worked at home. Who knew he tricked his parents into working overtime every day. In fact, he went to the Internet cafe to play games and worked for three months. I only knew about his work experience, so I went back without work. "I'm willing to buy a house because I want him to work well, but who knows he's still like that?". What should I do?

reply:

According to your own statement, since you became pregnant, the "lucky (sexual) life" between you and your husband has disappeared. In fact, along with his sense of family responsibility, a man's sense of mission, as well as his caring and caring for you, his treasure of marriage, his love for his family, his wife and children, as well as various conflicts between his wife and daughter-in-law, the triviality of life, are all superimposed together, So that you slowly feel cold, heartbroken, and cold.

For couples, the harmony and satisfaction of "sex" is undoubtedly very important, and it is clear that you have suffered a lot in this area. And more importantly, your husband has ignored you for a long time, disregarding your existence, and did not provide the minimum companionship and care of a husband when you were sick and hospitalized. Such a cold and even cold-blooded man is truly impressive.

But, on the other hand, who's ultimately at fault for living with such a worthless and unbearable man? After all, this is the result of your own choice. When you complain about him, do you also need to hold yourself accountable? The world is so big, who called himself so bad at first, but he just decided to be his partner! In fact, when you fall in love, you should understand that he is a very selfish and self centered guy who demands sexual satisfaction from you before marriage. If you don't want it, he gets angry and threatens you with a breakup. Does such a man have respect for you and truly love you? Unfortunately, you finally compromised and did not see his fatal flaws. From this moment on, your future is doomed.

Of course, another factor that leads to your unhappy marriage today is that your parents did not provide you with the correct education and guidance. They inappropriately instilled "contentment" and "excessive ingratiation" into you, resulting in your suffering in this marriage. "You need to realize that you are an independent individual, and you have your own marriage attitude, family values, and lifestyle. You should not obey your parents in everything. It is precisely because after marriage, you may have high demands on yourself and low demands on your husband, and as a result, you implicitly condone his behavior. In itself, he is the only child in the family, pampered by his parents, and then you let him go. Do you think he can still be okay?"? It's strange that he's not corrupt and playful!

Couples live together as one another, and cannot expect unilateral contributions and sacrifices. At the same time, there should be demands and expectations between each other, and set their own bottom line for this. If the other party exceeds this bottom line, it is absolutely not allowed, otherwise it is cruel to oneself.

In this case, in the face of a man who has no affection, no share, no temperature, no sex, no love, no sexual intercourse, no face, no skin, no responsibility, no heart, no lungs, and no responsibility, what is the significance of this marriage? If you are a woman who can stand on your own feet and not rely on others, I suggest you don't need to continue to grievance yourself. If you just come to me to vent your complaints, I will have no choice but to hehe you.

Finally, I want to remind you not to rely on an affair to seek comfort because your marriage is not happy. If you do, it will ultimately hurt you!