In order to retaliate against my husband, I played an extramarital affair, and marriage is difficult to retrieve

After marriage, our life remained calm as ever, and my husband remained considerate towards me as always. He is not a male chauvinist and can do some household chores. In fact, he spends more time at home doing these things than I do. However, he often forgets my birthday and our wedding anniversary, and foreign festivals such as Valentine's Day and Christmas have no concept in his mind. He is not good at expressing emotions and cannot say those sweet words. Every time I complain to him about being together for so long and he never gives me any gifts, he will say, "You have all the money at home, you can buy whatever you like." My enthusiasm was cooled by his words. He talks all day, plain is true. But this kind of plain water is too tasteless and tasteless.

My husband loves children very much, and when he sees cute children from other families, he also likes them and wants to hug and tease them. But I don't know why, after 4 years of marriage, my stomach hasn't moved at all. Most of the friends who grew up with my husband and colleagues of his age are now fathers. My husband is quite anxious, and the elders of the two families are also urging me. We both went to the hospital for a check-up and it turned out that we had no problems. Therefore, my husband suspected me of being playful and afraid of having a child with a distorted figure, so he didn't want the child and secretly took the contraceptive pill on his back. He hinted at me several times and I told him that I had not taken any contraceptive measures, but he just didn't believe it. No wonder he doesn't believe it. I don't like children as much as he does, and I think it's optional. Even before getting married, I discussed the issue of Tink with him, but he didn't agree, so I gave up this idea. However, I didn't expect that communication would actually tie a knot in his heart.

Due to this knot, my husband and I had multiple disputes, and our relationship became very tense at one point. Then during that time, I accidentally noticed that he often made phone calls behind my back. Later, I tried to retrieve his call records and found that he had frequent contact with a mobile phone number, and each call lasted for a long time. According to that number, it was indeed answered by a woman. I didn't say a word, just hung up. In addition, on his phone, I also saw a text message from that phone number. Although it was just some daily greetings, due to a woman's sixth sense, how do I feel about the ambiguous language in the content.

Based on these clues, I started questioning my husband, but because there was no tangible evidence, he flatly denied it. For this matter, we argued for most of the night that day, but later he couldn't support it and began to beg for mercy, saying that he had to work the next day and couldn't withstand such a struggle. I refused and insisted that he immediately reveal his ugly appearance. In the end, he became angry and slammed the door out. After wandering outside for over an hour, he returned, but instead of entering the bedroom, he slept directly in the living room.

A fleeting thought

I was so angry in my heart. Although he had done something wrong, he was even more righteous than me. I decided to ignore him, but to my surprise, he really got into trouble with me. For half a month, we didn't pay attention to anyone.

Feeling depressed, I often hang out online to pass the time. Liyang is a netizen I met a long time ago. I didn't have much contact at first, but during that time, I spent more time online and often met him online. I talked a lot, and gradually, I told him all about my troubles, the troubles caused by not having children for my family, and the various suspected cheating behaviors of my husband in recent times. I don't know how I could have said so much to a stranger back then, I just felt like I needed a pair of listening ears and some understanding and care from others. At that moment, Liyang took advantage of the situation and comforted me from the perspective of a man. His humor and wit temporarily forgot my troubles, and even when he invited me out for coffee, I agreed without hesitation.

I don't know if this is considered revenge, but when we met for the third time, Li Yang and I crossed the line. After the incident, even myself was extremely shocked. Although I love to play, I am not a casual woman. After marriage, I have never had the idea of cheating. Even if there have been temptations around me, I am not moved at all. But now, I have crossed the bottom line because I suspect my husband's betrayal, which seems somewhat incredible to me.

Liyang is also a married person. For our extramarital "relationship", he said that as long as we hide it well and do not damage both families, our relationship will not harm anyone. On the one hand, I used his "theory" to anesthetize myself. It was my husband who did something wrong to me first. Moreover, he himself was not aware of it, so there was no harm to him. On the other hand, I felt that for any reason, doing such a thing would be disloyal to my marriage, and I was even more afraid that one day, if I couldn't contain it, I would set myself on fire. Driven by this ambivalence, my relationship with Li Yang was intermittent. Later, I became more and more guilty.

Tianyi played tricks on people, just as I had decided to completely break with Liyang, my husband accidentally discovered the existence of Liyang. It's also my fault for a moment of carelessness. When I left the computer, I forgot to turn off QQ, and my husband happened to be searching for information online at that time. When he saw the avatar of Liyang flashing on my QQ, he casually opened it. However, the language of the message was ambiguous, and he flipped through the chat records again, revealing everything.

This time, it was his turn to question, and I came to explain. In fact, I had nothing to defend myself from. The conversation in the chat record had already clearly told him what had happened.

Mutual suspicion

So far, divorce seems to have become the only option, but I never expected that when I asked for a divorce, my husband would not agree. After weighing for a long time, he said he decided to forgive me. I don't know what he made this decision out of, but to be honest, I don't want to take the step of divorce easily, after all, divorce itself is a very embarrassing thing, let alone because of such unbearable reasons. My husband made a statement, and I also made my own commitment to completely cut off contact with Liyang and never meet again. I had such a plan originally, so the termination with Liyang was very straightforward. Liyang used to see this extramarital affair as a love game between you and me. When he learned that my husband had discovered us, he was eager to get rid of our relationship, so he never bothered me again.

It's completely over with Liyang, but on my husband's side, it's difficult to reunite with a broken mirror. When I first decided to turn around, I had a premonition that our future life would be difficult, but there was no way out. There was never regret medicine in the world.

Our marriage seems to have survived on the surface, but on the inside, it is scarred. There is a barrier in both people's hearts, although no one wants to touch it, they cannot escape its existence. My infidelity became a stain on my husband's heart that he could never erase. Although he promised to let bygones be bygones, it was actually difficult to do so. He always suspects that I have a connection with Liyang. No matter what I say or do, he always looks at me with a skeptical eye, either questioning or indifferent to me. A few days ago, when I returned home from work, my husband's gaze swept over me like a ray of radiation as soon as I entered the door. He coldly remained silent for no reason. I searched desperately in my heart, what did I do wrong? Living such a day every day is really difficult for people to breathe. I am burdened with a debt that I will never be able to repay, struggling and facing a dilemma.

On the other hand, the knot in my heart has never been untied, because my husband has never explained the relationship between the woman who has been in frequent contact and him. He said it was an ordinary friend, but I don't believe it at all. While he was suspicious of me, I actually didn't trust him either. He checked my QQ and I flipped through his phone.

In this marriage of mutual suspicion, I am almost suffocated, living every day like a year, unsure of what will be waiting for us in the future?

Reporter's Notes

The infidelity in marriage is committed by one party, but the root cause is definitely on both parties. Couples have a deep emotional connection, mutual care, and good communication, so external temptations will not easily pose a threat. Only when there is a problem between two people that cannot be resolved in a timely manner, can one party seek solace from the outside.

But no matter how frustrated one is or how emotional one needs to find a breakthrough, one must firmly grasp oneself and hold onto one's moral bottom line. Wei Zi'an of the Qing Dynasty wrote in his "Flower and Moon Traces": "A mistake becomes eternal hatred, and a hundred years have passed since turning back." In this sentence, "one", "a thousand", and "a hundred" form a sharp contrast, warning the world that making mistakes is often a fleeting thought, but the cost of mistakes is enormous.

(Intern Editor: Lai Jiaxing)