Post Date December, 03 2023
I don't know what to say, I'm not sure if I like him, or if he likes me?
I met him at the workplace, and in the eyes of others, my job was disgraceful. When I met him, he hadn't divorced yet, but he divorced a year later. I got divorced shortly after I met him... I have a child.
After the divorce, he didn't work anymore... He always gave me living expenses, and I also had two abortions for him within a year. I never felt guilty about him, and later said I didn't want it. We often argue and break up many times... I am very tired now... I can't bear the disagreement and different opinions from my family anymore.
I don't understand why he would do so much if he didn't like me. My family is from the countryside, and he said they can't make much money in a year... They spent 20000 yuan to buy some medicinal seeds and plant them in the field. They also spent 40000 yuan to renovate their simple house. But he and I are still so unclear, I don't feel any sense of security... He divorced... He said he can't be with me now. He has to take care of the children and the elderly, and he cannot let the children and the elderly know that he is divorced. He only comes to me after dinner every night and goes home before twelve o'clock
I am renting a house here, and I dare not even drag in with the people around me. After meeting him, all my friends have cut off contact and I have no one to talk to. When you're upset, call him and he's not happy. He said you were unhappy and didn't allow him to be happy. I feel uncomfortable in my heart... I just want to talk to him about my feelings, but he doesn't have any comfort... He can only do this now.
I'm not sure if Brother Shan can see clearly what I described. Could you please take your time.
reply:
1. I'm not sure what profession you are actually engaged in, but from your description, it can be understood that your profession may be quite special, or it may be working in the nightclub, or it may be a woman who has made mistakes. Since others think your job is not glamorous, I don't think the man you meet at work may be much better. Perhaps he is the male customer you serve. Between you, from the beginning of the extramarital affair to the end of each having their own freedom, you may expect him to give you a result, but he has too many concerns.
2. Why are you two not happy together? And there is no clear result? The relationship between you is inherently unequal and impure. At first, it was just taking what each person needed, what kind of emotions are there? You still don't know if you like him? I'm not sure if he likes you either? It means that there's just one thing between you. In the eyes of this man, he doesn't look up to you at all, so he won't cherish you either. The reason why you can continue to maintain this relationship is simply to maintain an attraction under the stimulation of stealing. As the novelty gradually fades and becomes dull, this man will eventually leave you one day.
3. A marriage that is not blessed will never bring happiness. Why don't your family and friends value you? Because being together makes it impossible for everyone to see the true burning of emotions, it's just a simple way of achieving each other, even utilizing and being utilized. Since that man is not willing to openly accept you in his heart, nor does he want to give you the desired result, but rather prefers to maintain an unclear underground relationship with you, what are your options and how much confidence do you have to elevate your relationship to the height of marriage?
4. Everyone wants a perfect marriage, wants to live the life they want, and longs for the person they love. However, the premise is that you must first see yourself clearly, or say you must be worthy. That is to say, from the beginning, your attitude towards emotions must follow the rules of the game. Once you violate your personal bottom line and break the rules of the game, even in the game of life, what you get will be the result of being played. So, let's take a clear look at reality. If we are just numb and unable to find the feeling of love and being loved together, what good future and outcome can this relationship have, apart from sticking together?
