Post Date December, 03 2023
My husband and I worked in Beijing and knew each other. The same company, the same department, and the desks were adjacent, so we became very good "neighbors". He is very excellent, and is often praised by people, regardless of his performance or popularity. Gradually, I found that I fell in love with him and felt more and more strongly about him. I have no experience of love, and I am not sure it is love. With the constant expansion of love hormones, I mustered up the courage to tell him. The confession went well and he accepted me.
My family is a native of Beijing. He is a foreigner. Our love has not been supported by our family. My father, in particular, reminded me that every sentence could not be separated from his poor family. My husband's family is poor, but he has high ambition and strong self-esteem. In the face of my father's words, he couldn't accept it and wanted to give up. My persistence and hard work finally changed back to my parents' consent.
When I got married, he couldn't give me anything. The house and car are all handled by my family, and the wedding is also handled at my home. In the eyes of outsiders, my husband is an encumbrance. At the same time, we also set up a banquet at his house to save money and keep everything simple. After marriage, I quit my job. The company has regulations that the husband and wife cannot be in the same company. After three months of marriage, I was pregnant. My job search has been temporarily postponed. The nature of his work has changed and the frequency of business trips has increased. Sometimes we can't meet several times a month.
For a married man, business trip means a great chance of cheating. I don't distrust him, but most of them cheat. In fact, men cheat because of their physiological needs everywhere. We have been married for two years now, and the signs of his cheating are more and more obvious. When I catch them, the third person is pregnant, but has already done it. Because the third party also has a family, they are completely lonely together.
He told me all the truth. He thought my father looked down on him. He couldn't look up. He did something wrong to me and made my parents sad, so he would feel very happy. At that moment, my heart was calm. I have this idea in my mind: collect the evidence of his cheating, let him clean out of the house, and keep the child with my surname.
A few days later, I said what I thought, and my husband advised me to calm down. Like all cheating men, he asked me to give him time. The plot of this TV series happens around me again and again. I couldn't give him time. In the situation of precarious feelings, I went to the Civil Affairs Bureau with him. All the way to the Civil Affairs Bureau, the staff were so tired that they didn't want to talk to us, let alone deal with us. Let's figure out what to do. A few hours later, he confessed to me that in addition to revenge on my family, the derailment was a thrill that could not be found in me.
My birth determines my mind. My mother taught me that I should not be an open girl. Indeed, I dare not try many movements and postures between us in life. If so, is it necessary to continue our marriage?
Reply from the consultant:
At the beginning, you have an emotional foundation. The source of emotional conflicts is because of your parents. A man is a man who wants face, and your father's words have severely hit his self-esteem, and you are your father's favorite daughter. His revenge will fall on you. In addition, he often travels and has few communication in his life, which makes it easier for him to yearn for the outside world.
The fragility of marriage can't be defeated overnight. As the small conflicts become thicker and thicker, the relationship between feelings will become weaker and weaker. The sexual affairs between husband and wife should be open. No one is perfect. Do your best to maintain your marriage. Give each other some time and space, calm down, and then make the next step.
