What should I do if my husband refuses to forgive me for doing something I shouldn't do with my ex-boyfriend

[Case description]

My current husband and I got married in a flash and got a certificate within two months of knowing each other. He was five years older than me and had a short marriage experience. The marriage relationship lasted less than one year and then divorced without children. He said that he had experienced too much pain before, so he would never let the tragedy happen again. We also belong to the model of first getting married and then falling in love.

After marriage, my relationship with him has increased, and he has become more and more considerate. I also rely on him. However, one day I found that he still had contact with his ex-wife. His ex-wife had run away with a rich man. Now the rich man was not good to her, and she wanted to come back. I felt as if he hesitated a little, but was angry enough to poke the matter through. He said that I violated his privacy and shouldn't turn over his mobile phone. We all felt justified at that time. We were too angry and quarrelled. Later, we also fought.

I can't stand it. My man beat me for another woman and ran out in a rage. Those days, I was also very depressed. He seemed to have no regrets and didn't apologize to me. In my anger, I contacted my ex-boyfriend to complain to him. A few days later, I was persuaded by him, and it was not worth it for me. He had been married before, and he was not loyal to me. I have no reason to tolerate the mess between him and her ex-wife.

In retrospect, I feel that I must have been crazy at that time. I believe my ex-boyfriend's words inexplicably. I feel that he still loves me inexplicably. I have a relationship with him inexplicably. When he woke up, he left, and then the phone couldn't get through. Only then did I realize that he had always lied to me. I regret it, and I am also very upset. I am completely awake. I love my husband now and should not betray him like this. I decided never to contact my ex-boyfriend again.

Recently, my husband has always been like a hooligan. Despite my objection, he began to toss about that matter at night and scolded me for being shameless, bitch... Later I learned that he knew I was in contact with my ex-boyfriend. I explained that he didn't listen and said he had received my MMS. That photo was actually a picture of me doing that kind of thing with my ex-boyfriend in the hotel. The whole thing turned out to be a revenge of my ex-boyfriend.

My husband said that he would not publicize this matter, but his heart was very painful, and he would think of my cheating every night. Our husband and wife's life has not improved. The next day, he will double his kindness to me, but I feel pain and sweet at the same time. I also want to erase this stain from my life. I want to have a baby recently to improve our relationship, but I don't know if it is useful. Is his rudeness still worth my trust?

[Answer]

For a man, cheating is nothing more than slapping him in front of everyone and knocking him down.

From your husband's marital performance, he is loyal to you and kind and respectful of you. Judging from your affair, he didn't blame you, didn't make it public, and didn't choose to give up your marriage, which is not emotional enough. From a certain point of view, he respects you and is kind. Such a man is worthy of women's trust.

What you lack is communication, communication methods after conflicts occur. Both of them are not good at expressing themselves and keep their depression in their hearts, which leads to things becoming more serious than expected. You can try to sit together and talk about it, and then make a choice, even if it is a divorce. You should show an attitude, not guilt, obedience and humbleness. What is an attitude? An attitude that makes him feel that you value him, your mistakes and your marriage.

To improve your existing feelings, start from yourself. No man can accept that his woman betrayed him, especially the man who had a marriage wound. Even if he chooses to forgive you on the surface, his heart is very painful. As a woman, if she knows she is wrong, she should redouble her efforts to express her consideration, love and responsibility for the family. For example, we should be more independent, not angry, change our mobile phone number, have our own work, learn to be a good and considerate wife, and be proud of him

Having children is a link to improve marriage, but it must not be a bridge to resolve conflicts. The child is innocent. I hope you can bring your child to the world without any purpose after solving the conflict correctly. Otherwise, the conflict will not be solved at all and will continue in the future. Time will make people see everything clearly. As long as you have a sincere heart to influence him, you can win his trust. If time can't make this man trust you again, you can leave as soon as possible. Some scars will fester into cancer and become the source of pain that can never be saved.