Unexpectedly discovered that my husband had an affair with my third child while I was pregnant, which caused me to collapse

After 5 years of marriage, I couldn't bear his betrayal and infidelity. My husband and I have been married for five years. We have two children. Xiao Bao has only been 55 days. Just when I was pregnant with Xiao Bao, my husband cheated, and I was cheated by him like a fool until now. I don't know how they started, I only found out on October 4th that my husband had an affair. I happened to see his other phone charging by chance, and coincidentally, the message came. I didn't even know that the man I had always trusted would cheat and betray me. My mistress was still pregnant, and I instantly collapsed.

My husband and I were classmates in junior high school. For him, I didn't even go to college. He looked average and his family was average, and my parents didn't look up to him. When I married him, both of them wanted to sever their relationship with me. When I got married, I was only 20 years old and didn't understand anything. I just thought this man was good to me. Without a house, a car, or money, I didn't care. I thought he was a potential stock and everything would be fine.

Since getting married, my family has been spending more money on us. I thought my husband would know how to be grateful to my parents. Otherwise, he wouldn't be grateful at all. I think my parents should treat him like this. In 2013, when I bought a car, my mother gave me tens of thousands. In 2014, when he started his own business and started a factory, my mother gave me tens of thousands more. In 2015, when I bought a house, my mother also gave me tens of thousands. I thought he would be even more kind to me, but as a result, he took my money to raise his mistress.

When I was pregnant with Dabao, he was very kind to me. He accompanied me during the prenatal examination and helped me with household chores, everything was fine. The second child was not something I wanted to give birth to, it was something he insisted on giving birth to. Since I became pregnant, I have been the only one who goes to the prenatal examination regardless of weather. I personally send my boss to school, buy groceries, cook, and wash clothes. He doesn't accompany me to the prenatal examination even when he's online at home. Even the doctor says, 'It's always you, don't you have a husband?'? You have too much courage to ride a bike and run on your own with a big belly. I also smiled and said that my husband is so busy and doesn't have time. In fact, he doesn't accompany me to the hospital even when he sleeps at home. I can only comfort myself and say that I can do it myself.

In June of this year, my husband's phone changed its password, and I never cared, nor did I get used to reading his phone. We haven't slept together since we got pregnant, and I don't have any doubts. I come back so late every night, almost always at dawn. When I asked him why, he either said he had dinner or went online, but I didn't ask much. I never suspected that he was outside. If it weren't for the text message on October 4th, I wouldn't have known he was cheating and raising a mistress. I called a woman who answered the phone and asked her who she knew. After a while, the woman said she didn't know and hung up. If she called again, she wouldn't answer. I asked my husband about the text message, but he refused to admit it and said he didn't know him. He sent the wrong message, so don't think too much, and I'll believe it.

Later, I searched for the woman's WeChat account and added it. I found out that she was near my husband's company. My husband still refused to admit that he didn't know her, but I still believed it. I told myself that I had thought too much. However, on October 6th, I saw my husband's WeChat message, which was sent by the woman asking her to take her for an abortion for 10000 yuan. I was furious at the time, but I didn't break out and told my mother-in-law that I still believed him. At night, I told him that I knew everything about you, so you don't have to hide it from me anymore. As long as you confess, I can forgive you. For the sake of the children's good life, my husband still didn't say it. He said he was just looking for a young lady, He doesn't have money to raise a mistress, he didn't betray me. I said that even a young lady can get pregnant. You're lying to a ghost, he just refuses to admit raising a mistress.

I said we should divorce. He said he would leave when he left. If he said nothing, you don't believe me. If I said nothing, the bitch asked you to accompany her to have an abortion. He also said that your child, don't treat me as a fool. Take my money to raise a mistress. You are so powerful. You are too fucking cheap. Later on, I saw him transfer 6180 yuan to Xiao San. I wanted to settle the matter after giving money, but they still contacted me on WeChat, but I don't know what to talk about. My husband still keeps Xiao San's WeChat, and Xiao San still sends him messages. I thought of getting divorced, but my brother lent us 50000 yuan, and my husband hasn't returned it yet. I must get the money back. Until now, he has been deceiving me all the time. He still comes back very late. I called him and asked if he said he was online or something was wrong, but he still came back at dawn. I've had enough of these days, I really don't want to go on anymore.

Yesterday, I saw several other women's chat records on his WeChat account on his phone again, mostly including: "Beauty, are you here? Are you dating? I treat you to dinner, watch movies, and sing. Some women just answer the phone, yes. Wherever the address is, he will drive to pick it up. It is only now that I truly see the face of this man. I haven't thought about life anymore, it's boring. Over the years of getting married, I have been putting in effort and actively supporting everything he does. The money he saves is for him to use outside. Who knows that he fell in love with other women when I was pregnant with Xiaobao, often took him out for fun, and I foolishly took care of my two children at home. I never thought too much, never thought that this man would be unfaithful or cheat. I'm so tired now, I don't want to worry anymore. I just want a divorce, but I don't know what to do with my children? I don't want to keep such a man either.

reply:

Briefly summarize the tragedy that led to your marriage today: self assertion, self righteousness, and blind marriage before marriage; After marriage, indulging in indulgence, blindly optimistic, and being too careless. The ultimate root cause is that you cannot recognize people, cannot see each other clearly, and have married the wrong person. From various situations, your husband is really a scumbag. With such a scumbag, do you have a better choice than to leave him?

Of course, the challenge now is that you have two children, both of whom are very young, especially if your second child is less than two months old. At this point, even if you want a divorce, the court may not be able to give a verdict. Therefore, choosing a divorce is not a problem, but it may be a matter of time; Children are not a problem either, as they should not be a reason or excuse for tying up unhappy marriages. The key issue now is that you need to make all the preparations before divorce, and you need to have the capital and ability to divorce. For example, regarding the issue of financial resources, the issue of child custody, and how to ensure a happier life after divorce. If you believe that you can be a strong woman, and if you are confident that your life will be better after divorce than it is now, there is nothing to worry about choosing a divorce.

So, divorce can solve the boredom and awkwardness of your current marriage, but it is also important to consider the life you will face after divorce, whether you are prepared to make a new choice or choose to live alone, which requires in-depth consideration. If you make a new choice, then when it comes to choosing a romantic partner and managing a marriage, you must reflect and not let yourself repeat the same mistakes.

In short, let yourself not engage in unprepared battles. No matter what choices you make, whether it's a current marriage or a plan based on your future life, let yourself make choices in a relatively calm, rational, and sober state, and don't make blind choices again.