Post Date December, 03 2023
"Everyone said that this circle is very chaotic and it is difficult for comrades to find true love". This is not the first time I have heard gay visitors describe the gay love world in this way. So I think that in the mainstream heterosexual social environment, comrades should cherish love more, but what is love like? Is there no love between men and men in the traditional view of love? If it is the love of three men, should we cherish it?
Yes, this is the story of three men.
K has a man he likes very much. We call him X. This is the first man in K's strict sense. We have been together for nearly three years and have not lived together. In the same city and work circle, there are many things that can be discussed and exchanged, and the relationship has always been good. Half a year ago, K found out that there was a man outside X who we called L, who had been dating for half a year, but he was just a fireman. Who knows, he got deeper and deeper.
According to K, X has much more emotional experience than he does. When this happened, K was still more rational and had several rounds of discussion and communication with X. He needs X to make a choice, either K or L. In his opinion, he likes X, and he has paid full affection to X, and in terms of equality, X also needs to love him equally. But X said: I like you, but I also like him very much. Do you understand? I don't want either of them, neither of them wants to let go.
At the time of three men's entanglement and choice, the 29-year-old X was found to have a relatively rare cancer, and he had to be operated immediately, otherwise his life would be in danger. Facing the joke of fate, exclusive love began to be put aside. K didn't have such a strong aversion to the appearance of L during the X operation, although he thought that sometimes the person who appeared there should be me, and the person who took care of him should be me.
The operation was successful, and X began to recover gradually. It seems that X felt that both men were indispensable in life after experiencing this event. One is considerate and obedient to satisfy his strong desire for control. The other is rational and has been with him for many years. He can't bear to give up. Neither K nor L can accept the relationship between the three people. The most painful thing is K. All this broke through his understanding of love.
Leave, don't give up, because you like, because you are afraid of not meeting, and there are not many comrades. Together, there will be pain and bumps. Why should I share my you with another person. X obviously doesn't want to change, or X is such a person. It's just that K didn't know and didn't have such psychological expectations. Or we are all such people. We don't know ourselves well enough. Human nature is always selfish. People all over the world must love themselves and want to have the love of the whole world. But there is always a gap between fantasy and reality. You learn to compromise or compromise, and even learn to adapt to the monogamous mainstream society.
Love is originally constructed by society. There are short, loyal, long-term and shared love. No one is better than the other. Just like you are sure that Mount Taishan Mountain is more beautiful than Mount Huangshan Mountain? No, but they have their own characteristics. For example, Mount Taishan is magnificent and Mount Huangshan is beautiful. Everyone's view of love is different, even now is different from the past, and the future may become another kind of appearance. You can change your ideas to fit a person, or you can stick to your ideas and find a suitable person.
Love is what you are willing to allow to hurt. Loyalty and permanence are precious because they are rare. And short, derailment and betrayal are the normal state of love. You should have some resistance.
