Post Date December, 03 2023
Couple sexual psychology: the sexual psychology of disharmony in couples' sexual life
According to a survey, the vast majority of marital sexual disharmony is not due to illness or physical barriers, nor is it due to psychological problems. It is often due to certain misunderstandings in one or both parties' sexual concepts that lead to specific behavioral conflicts and conflicts.
1、 There is a consensus among men who overemphasize the frequency and frequency of sexual activity. It seems that the more sexual activity they have, the more qualified and masculine they become; The more satisfied and happy his wife became. Conversely, less frequent husbands are described as "unable to serve (or cope with) their wives" and as "not being masculine enough.".
In fact, most wives don't think so. According to an expert survey of 1279 couples in 31 large and medium-sized cities (based on this survey), 78% of wives value emotional communication more than sexual life. Compared to the quality of sexual life (how much orgasm a wife can get from it), 85% of wives prefer to achieve high quality rather than large quantities of sexual life. Men's sexual practices are not "more is better.".
Between the ages of 30 and 35, more than half of husbands experience a virtually silent change in their sexual needs, shifting from a need for large quantities to a desire for high-quality, deeper emotional communication and experience. For this reason, if a man conceptually believes that the frequency of sexual activity is the main or even the only measure of marital harmony, he is likely to make two behavioral mistakes.
2、 Overemphasizing the role of sexual techniques can have beneficial effects in specific situations of a particular couple, and extremely appropriate sexual techniques can have beneficial effects. However, we must not forget that there must be four fundamental prerequisites for sexual skills: first, both spouses must be absolutely voluntary and truly needed. Otherwise, it will not only violate the personal dignity of the other party, but also cause psychological harm to both parties, which will definitely not produce good results. Secondly, the relationship between husband and wife must be quite good.
3、 Understanding sexual life too narrowly In couples' sexual life, men eventually ejaculate, but this is neither the entire content of sexual life nor its primary goal. Sex is a vehicle for expressing love. It must include a prior psychological preparation stage, and the quality of the final result largely depends on whether the preparation stage is appropriate and sufficient.
First, he may ignore or deny his wife's emotional needs, simplifying his sexual life into a series of actions, and seriously damaging his wife's personality and emotions. Secondly, he may virtually increase his psychological burden.
"Once you are older, or encounter special circumstances occasionally, and cannot maintain the high frequency that you believe, you may suspect that you have" impotence "or" premature ejaculation "or other" diseases, "fear that you are" sorry for your wife, "and may even doubt or lose hope for your entire personality and life goals.". As a result, the stronger you are, the less you can withstand accidents. In fact, the frequency of male 14's sexual life is basically determined by their physiological status and age, and is similar across all ethnic groups in the world. In addition, almost every man's life, there are some periods that are few, and some periods that are many. There is no such question as "how many times should there be?".
Men's sexual charm mainly lies in their mature personality, understanding and broad mind, and deep and persistent emotions. If you do not pay attention to these aspects of cultivation, but blindly care about or boast about the frequency of sex, then it is difficult for men to get out of the misunderstanding of sexual life.
Third, the level of sexual knowledge and attitudes on both sides must be very consistent.
Fourth, the sexual techniques used must have undergone rigorous scientific testing and proven their applicability in clinical medicine. Any inconsistency in the feelings and knowledge of a husband and wife, any hearsay or partial understanding, can have the opposite negative effect on sexual skills. More importantly, sexual techniques alone cannot create feelings of love and concern, nor can they fully communicate and communicate. In our country, at least half of the wives neither need nor appreciate their husbands' sexual skills.
They particularly resent husbands using themselves as a "tool" or "stage" where men blindly "use" or "perform.". In this situation, couples will only become increasingly estranged, indifferent, and even conflict. As all happy couples know, the most advanced and versatile "sexual technique" is not actually a movement but a soul, which is to pour and concentrate as much of the true feelings of love, attachment, intimacy, and concern into their sexual life as possible.
Some husbands view their physiological processes as primary and non adjustable, with the result often being too eager, rude, and simple. In urban couples in China, one quarter have never kissed each other, and more than half have never deeply kissed each other; 41% to 53% did not touch their wives at all. However, at the same time, 83% of people believe that their marriage is very satisfactory or relatively satisfactory.
