Post Date December, 03 2023
That ambiguous recording
[Narrator: My husband Yuan Lang]
I am a man who has little ability and can't earn much money. In order to get a promotion, Wang Hui, regardless of our newlyweds, wants to live separately from me, which is hard for me to accept. I called her and sent her text messages, but in fact, it was more about yearning and anxiety.
Wang Hui resigned and opened a clothing store without asking my opinion. I am very unhappy. But in order to support her, I still quit my job in the factory. Since I went to the store, she had to sleep until 11 a.m. every day and asked me to go home to cook at noon. Sometimes she thought I was slow.
I can understand all this. After all, it is hard to do business. She is not healthy and in good mood. But with money, she no longer treated me as well as before, but became more powerful and hard to hear. As long as I don't conform to her heart, she will scold me and say nothing about me.
I want to make love when I get home. She always turns her back to me. She will respond to my request immediately. Apart from her affair, I can't find any other reason to explain it. There was a time when she went to buy goods, which always took a long time. When I asked her, she said there was a traffic jam. Our store is less than 10 kilometers away from the place of purchase, and it takes two hours to go back and forth at most. It is obvious that she is lying. Moreover, she is more and more fond of dressing up. I have seen her giggle in front of the mirror many times.
One day, the business in the store was not very good. I went home early. Wang Hui called in the living room, and I went to the bedroom to play games. At this time, someone called Wang Hui's QQ. I checked the chat record by the way after I clicked it, and found that she called each other "dear" when chatting with netizens. I was dumbfounded and asked her what was the matter. She said that the other party was a classmate who played well when she was a child, which was normal. Her explanation was so untenable that I left a big question mark in my heart.
Later, Wang Hui asked me to learn auto repair. The thought of that "dear" makes me feel uneasy. So I bought a recorder and secretly put it in my bedroom before I left. After returning home in the evening, I turned on the recording and heard a woman's petite gasp, which sounded like Wang Hui. I feel like I'm going to collapse! But she was sly, saying that it was the voice of the heroine in the TV series
Of course I won't believe it. We always fight after that. Every time she quarreled, Wang Hui threatened to divorce. What's more incredible is that she also hit me. One night, instead of cooking, she chatted happily with netizens. I forced the cable away, which caused her anger. She said, "If you don't take it out, I'll kill you!" I ignored her words, and she turned to the kitchen and rushed over with a knife.
During the fight, she cut a blood cut in my leg with a knife, and the blood ran down my pants. Another time, we quarreled about something in the store, and she slapped me in the face of the clerk.
I can't stand Wang Hui's crazy behavior. Thinking of that recording, I'm sure she is someone outside and doesn't want to live with me anymore.
A husband who is always suspicious
[Narrator: wife Wang Hui]
I have been in bad health since I was young, and I have been rejected for several blind dates. When I met Yuan Lang for the first time, I had a good impression of him. A week later, I took the initiative to call him to express my gratitude. Yuan Lang knew my physical condition and still said that he was willing to accompany me for life, which moved me very much. Two months later, we got married.
When I first got married, I got only a few hundred yuan a month, and Yuan Lang was just an ordinary worker with low income. In order to improve the economic situation at home, I put all my thoughts into my work. Soon, a business manager of the company was transferred, and the leader wanted to fill the vacancy.
I have been in business before, so I took the initiative to apply to the company for this position. The leader agreed. The premise is to go to other places to exercise for half a year. As soon as I left, Yuan Lang's phone and text messages followed me. He kept urging me to go back, saying that I couldn't stand the separation of two places, and that there were so many temptations outside that I couldn't be immune.
He didn't understand at all, and I did it for his and his family. If he can earn money, does it need me to work so hard? Under his constant urging, I went back early within three months, and the promotion was also ruined.
With no hope of promotion, I quit my job and opened a clothing store with the help of my aunt. Slowly, the business of the clothing store started. I was busy inside and outside. The net profit of the clothing store is more than 10000 yuan per month, and we became rich in the small days when we were once short of money. But for a long time, I always feel tired because of my poor health. I especially hope Yuan Lang can come to the store to help.
Yuan Lang didn't want to come at first, but later people came to help him all day. He often made mistakes in purchasing and pricing, which caused a lot of losses to the business. I am very angry, and I don't understand why he used to be an expert in the factory, but now he is not as good as a shop assistant? I think either he is too stupid or he deliberately opposes me because he has always opposed me to do business.
I saw that he was not interested in the clothing store, and knew that he liked machinery, so I enrolled him in an auto repair class. Unexpectedly, my kindness became a donkey's liver and lung. He even suspected that I had separated him and made a mysterious recording for me, insisting that I betrayed him! I take interferon every day, and my hair is gone. Which man dares to get close to me? His suspicion is too heavy for me.
After that, the relationship between our husband and wife, which was neither hot nor cold, became worse. We gradually developed from repression and restraint to constant quarrels. It is common for us to quarrel three or four times a day. Every time I quarrel, Yuan Lang talks with the recording, and I can't argue.
I admit that I have a bad temper and sometimes beat him and scold him if I can't control my mood. However, for the sake of this family, I even lost my job. Even if he didn't appreciate it, he always doubted me. I really don't know whether I can live with him.
Ice diagnosis:
Weak marriage created by flash marriage
Wang Hui and Yuan Lang are "flash marriages". They do not have deep feelings and lack proper understanding of each other, resulting in a weak marriage foundation.
Because of her physical illness, Wang Hui, who has some inferiority complex, urgently wants to make up for her weakness in other ways so that her husband can feel that she won't lose by marrying herself. So she worked hard and even sacrificed her newlyweds' emotional cultivation. On the other hand, Wang Hui likes to be opinionated and arbitrary, which are her weaknesses and cause great harm to the relationship between husband and wife.
When Wang Hui's economic ability rose rapidly, her inner inferiority complex was well repaired, and she also occupied the dominant position in marriage. This reversal made her dissatisfied with her ordinary husband, and her weakness of character became more and more unconcerned. It was inevitable to beat and scold her husband. Wang Hui believed that the problems of marriage were all caused by her husband's suspicion and her "disobedience", but she did not think about why her husband was so.
Yuan Lang's condition is relatively mediocre. He feels that his ability is poor and his wife's health is poor,; Both of them are not very good. It is not happiness to live an ordinary life together. Wang Hui's efforts broke the balance and brought great anxiety to Yuan Lang. Because of poor communication and passive personality, Yuan Lang expressed his emotions by destroying Wang Hui's career, which further stimulated Wang Hui's strength.
Yuan Lang, who was in a weak position in both career and family life, was deeply upset and angry. The ambiguous recording is like a powerful evidence, which makes Yuan Lang find a lifeline to restrict his wife, so he uses the recording to tell things everywhere instead of making some positive and beneficial efforts to change the marital dilemma.
Derailment is not the core of the problem
Has Wang Hui ever cheated? During the consultation, she was noncommittal, but only expressed her desire to continue living with Yuan Lang, and Yuan Lang also expressed her reluctance to end the marriage. In this case, both Wang Hui and Yuan Lang should ignore the recording, stop worrying about suspicion and cheating, and really face the problem and take the initiative to change.
Wang Hui should realize that she and her husband are two people. Don't take her expectations for granted, and respect her husband's attitude towards life. If you want your husband to become more progressive, you can put forward your hopes for yourself and your husband in the form of "family plan", and create a positive and progressive family atmosphere with common goals.
Secondly, we should show weakness in front of our husband to stimulate his sense of responsibility and motivation.
Finally, Wang Hui should be responsible for her own emotions. The husband has no obligation to bear all the bad feelings of his wife. Wang Hui should not compare her husband with others, let alone vent her bad temper on her husband.
What Yuan Lang needs to do is to give his wife more love and understanding; Second, realize that trusting your wife starts with trusting yourself. Yuan Lang suspects his wife because he doesn't believe he can keep his wife and doesn't trust his ability. When you become strong and confident in marriage, you will have the strength to trust your wife.
Therefore, Yuan Lang should find his own advantages to enhance his confidence. Finally, Yuan Lang should forget his wife's previous anomalies and recordings, and believe that his wife is willing to go with him. When encountering problems, he should take the initiative to face them, rather than take "cheating" as an example.
(Intern editor: Lai Jiaxing)
