Anyway, discovering oneself is a necessary path for us. I have a listener on the program "The Road to Wealth and Freedom Revolution" in the Himalayas, who found her true self at the age of 28.
She is the kind of young person I am talking about, the kind of person who gave up their choices too early. Her primary school was chosen by her parents, her middle school was chosen by her parents, her university was chosen by her parents, her major was chosen by her parents, and her first job was found by her parents. If you keep behaving like this, your husband will also be found by your parents. But facing the image of this obedient girl, she always vaguely feels that something is wrong.
Her first job was at a state-owned bank, officially established and working from nine to five. She just checked in and bought online photos at work, and complained that her supervisor was not up to par all day. Later, when I heard that my father had a better job to arrange for me, I thought it was a safe bet and couldn't bear the supervisor. I thought I was handsome and resigned.
After resigning, her father became furious and she realized that a new job was not necessarily certain. She used to work in Shenzhen, but her home is in Hainan. My parents took the opportunity to hope that she could return to their side, so they completely helped her arrange her work and husband.
But at this moment, she finally realized that the reason she had resigned was to no longer be at the mercy of others. If I go home, what is the meaning of my initial resignation?
For the first time in her life, she refused her parents' arrangement for this free choice and resolutely stayed in Shenzhen to find a job on her own. Her parents, on the other hand, have been waiting to see her joke of crashing into a wall. They never believe that their daughter can find a job on their own.
After facing unemployment pressure for five months, she really found a job, and it was a job that she was very satisfied with. During this period, she celebrated her 28th birthday. More miraculously, she wrote an article about her experience and published it on the short book of the WeChat official account platform. The next day, she made headlines, read more than 30000, received more than 1000 likes, and received many authorization invitations and private messages from official account!
For a moment, she felt like the legendary internet celebrity Big V!
Free choice allowed her to rediscover herself.
At present, she is living in a humble abode in Shenzhen and renting a space of her own. Cycling to and from work every day, no longer calling home three times a day. But in her opinion, it feels too good. This is a story that shines with freedom everywhere. Like most girls, she was arranged by her parents from a young age. But unlike many people, she found herself at the age of 28.
She chooses to dominate her life, stay in the city she likes, and do what she likes. She found her fellow free people on the internet and gained joy and happiness. She felt from the bottom of her heart that even if it was not easy to work hard in Shenzhen, living in a sublet apartment and cycling to and from work would be much better than the luxurious lifestyle arranged by her parents. Isn't that the true meaning of freedom and happiness?
Learn to refuse
Another listener, for her, truly came of age at the time of the unreasonable demands of two, and that year, she was 35 years old.
In May of 2016, she rejected her father for the first time in more than ten years. Her father would occasionally ask for money from her for various reasons, such as business travel expenses, salary, equipment purchase, etc., and he was always in a hurry. She once unconditionally supported her father because she believed that it was a child's obligation to their parents. Whenever her father needed money, she would immediately lend it to him. She had also borrowed money from friends and slowly repaid it herself. She had also personally delivered the money owed by her father to someone else's house as requested by her grandmother and apologized on his behalf. She complied with almost all the requests.
As her personal consciousness grew, she gradually realized that there were boundaries between her family. Firstly, being an independent person is the fundamental attribute of a person, and then one can assume the role of their daughter. For her family, both parents have retirement and medical insurance, and there is no problem living a good life in her hometown. She has never asked her parents for a penny to buy a house or pay off her mortgage. As for his father's business, it was his own choice, and he was responsible for the outcome.
She finally made a free choice and decided that she would only lend a helping hand to her father unless he had special life difficulties and needed help, and she would not support him in business matters. Afterwards, her father asked for money from her, and when it was confirmed that his father was still reaching out to her for business, although there was a great psychological burden, no matter how dissatisfied his father was and how much psychological pressure he exerted, she tried to resist.
She decided to stick to her principles until today.
Even though her father repeatedly influenced her through family public opinion, family persuasion, and other means, her mother repeatedly demanded that she compromise and obey, but she did not obediently comply as before.
In the end, she also achieved full peace of mind and gradually accepted the fact that there was a gap in her relationship with her parents, believing that their mentality would gradually change over time. Now, she feels more empowered and in control of her life, which is the joy of growth. Her experience perfectly illustrates freedom of choice. An adult in the internet age can truly understand the boundaries between herself and her parents. From the moment she freely chooses and takes on the barriers, she truly discovers her own value and significance as a person.
True happiness does not come from the recognition of people around us, nor from the recognition of parents, but from the control of one's own life and the joy of one's own growth. All happiness comes from oneself, and this happiness is the greatest, noblest, and most free.