Post Date December, 02 2023
The existence of "scissors difference" between husband and wife is inevitable. Generally, it will not directly affect the harmony of marriage and the relationship between husband and wife. However, when the difference between the two curves in the "scissors difference" is too large, the marriage will be contradictory or even broken. Therefore, the "curve" between husband and wife should not be too wide, and its distance should be appropriately reduced.
First of all, broaden the age gap and narrow the gap
The physical age gap between husband and wife should be appropriately widened. Because there is usually a certain time interval between the peak of marriage value orientation of men and women, the peak of women appears earlier, and the peak of men appears later. Therefore, opening the age gap between men and women can reduce the dislocation of the peak.
The marriage age of men and women is about 10 years apart. If 10 years old is set as the standard for the age gap between men and women, and the two curves representing the marriage value orientation of men and women in the "scissors difference" curve are translated, we can be surprised to find that the "scissors difference" will significantly shorten, or even not exist, and it is more likely to overlap into a parabola. In other words, the age gap of about 10 years old is the best way to ensure the coexistence of "men and women".
Secondly, cherish feelings without fear of age
Determine the factors that strengthen the relationship between husband and wife. In real life, the age difference between many couples is not large, but the relationship between husband and wife is also very strong, which is due to many factors that maintain the relationship between husband and wife, such as the mutual affection formed in the joint struggle, subjectively making both men and women have a solid emotional foundation.
After having children, both parties objectively have the common responsibility to raise and educate, and cherish their present feelings more out of love for their children; In addition, in the long-term common life, the interdependence of economic life also makes the relationship between husband and wife stable.
Finally, despise the appearance and attach importance to the truth
Change the simple "male talent and female beauty" into both talent and beauty. With the progress of society, women are no longer completely dependent on men economically, so appearance is no longer the only benchmark to evaluate women's marriage value orientation. When a woman grows with age, her talent is also growing, and her marriage value orientation does not decline with the decline of her appearance. This also warns us from another perspective that those who choose their spouse by looks, if they are only an embroidered pillow, its essence is like a "flash in the pan", and will lose value after the passing of time.
In short, to recognize and shorten the "scissors gap" between husband and wife is to prevent and avoid the potential "emotional crisis period" from becoming a real marital crisis, so as to achieve the goal of jointly maintaining the feelings of husband and wife, family harmony and stability.
(Intern editor: Lai Jiaxing)
