My husband is infatuated with female colleagues, and I feel insecure when I search for her on QQ every day

Reader's Letter

Brother Shan, my husband has someone in his heart, and the girl is only 27 this year. However, he has been liking her for 5 years. Although they haven't contacted each other, he looks for her on QQ every day and follows her every day. He told me 5 years ago that he had a heartbeat for her, and I even stole my husband's QQ space, which wrote over 200 stories about the girl.

Oh, he works with that girl. My husband is a school security guard, and she is a piano teacher. Although I know they are impossible, he has always been thinking about it. With his mother's help, he doesn't care about anything at home. As soon as he finished work, he sat in front of the computer reading news, watching movies, and listening to music, and he was very sad. Every day, he listened to those sad songs about love, as if they were all portraits of him.

At home, I hate him very much because he used to call me a slut, and from then on, I see he hates it. I don't know why this time, I missed him when he wasn't at home and went to work outside to pack food and shelter, but I don't know what to do? I have an impulse to send him a message, but I can't save face. I don't know if I should do this? I feel insecure now and can't do anything.

Reply

Hello, from your description, it can be seen that nothing has happened to your husband and his female colleagues. Your husband is only secretly thinking about others in his heart, and at most, he has an affair with that 27 year old piano teacher. So, you don't need to be nervous or sad. You may also understand in your heart that your husband is not worthy of that girl, so why bother so much.

Why does your husband appear in this state? On the one hand, as you said, he has nothing to do and everything at home is taken care of by his mother. Originally, as a security guard, he had nothing to do and had too much time to daydream. Even when he returned home, he had nothing to do. Why didn't he play with the computer? On the other hand, why did he focus on that girl instead of you? Have you ever thought about it? Why does he care so much about that woman and call you a slut? How did you offend him like this? This requires you to reflect carefully. What do you think is the difference between you and that girl? Is it not beautiful enough, is it not gentle and virtuous enough, is it not highly cultivated, is it not well educated, or is it a bad temper and personality?

When couples are together, it's better to communicate and exchange more. What do they like to do? You can start from the things they like, cultivate interests that share common interests with them, and have more common topics to promote the cultivation and improvement of relationships. Otherwise, it will only make the relationship colder and colder. Since you miss your husband, learn to take the initiative to express yourself. There is nothing embarrassing about it. If you always passively ignore the other person, over time, your husband is really easy to be taken away by others. Instead of being passive and anxious, it's better to take the initiative!