Post Date December, 02 2023
Today, I found out that my husband cheated on me twice last year and once this year. He is 16 years older than me and has a 13 year old son. I also gave birth to a son by Caesarean section this year, and now I am not in good health. Last year, we only had one month to complete our certificate for our first infidelity. This year, my son, who was seriously ill at home, and also the day after my birthday, accompanied another woman to play. All three infidelities involved three different women. He likes chatting online and is all a student. I guess these three are also netizen students. This month, my son passed away due to illness. From the bottom of my heart, I want a divorce. I don't allow betrayal, but I don't have the money now. Last year, I got pregnant and had a baby, so I didn't work.
"I now want to find a job and be independent. When I have stabilized, I will boldly propose a divorce.". I don't know how much money my family has. We've been together for many years, and for the first three years, we've been really happy. He's also very patient with me and has a good temper. He's been losing his temper with me since last year. Last year, he made a lot of money, changed from a van to an SUV, and bought a house. He still takes money seriously. My parents actually don't like him. They think he's strong and stubborn, and I can't control him. I hope I find a man with an ordinary job and family, who is willing to let me control the economic power of the family, and just live a simple life. "But because of me, I still choose to respect my decision. I didn't tell my family, nor did I tell him that I already knew about his infidelity. Teacher, what should I do? Give me some advice.".
reply:
Hello, perhaps your choice from the beginning was blind and faulty. It is precisely because you found an unreliable man and entered an unreliable marriage that you have achieved a disturbing present. "You have found an elderly married man and thought that marrying an uncle would enable you to live a safe and dependent life. However, the cruel reality tells you that all this is a dream.".
"When you chose to be with him at the beginning, what you valued must be his masculinity and domineering personality, and his ability to make money. However, you never examined his personality and attitude towards life and marriage.". "You think you can seize his heart when you are young, and he can circle around you every day. In the end, you can only miscalculate.".
"A man who has been cheating with you for just a month shows that his marriage certificate is a piece of waste paper for him, that marriage is a form, that his wife is just a decoration, and that his philosophy of life is nothing more than playing life as he pleases.". Marrying such a man is undoubtedly accompanied by pain and humiliation. "Such a poor product, you have chosen him as the object of marriage, but in the final analysis, it is the result of your self-righteous and willful blindness. Therefore, you must bear it.".
At this moment, your idea is also correct. In the current situation where you are unable to divorce, you can only compromise, strengthen yourself financially, strengthen yourself psychologically, prepare yourself adequately, and then seek opportunities to deal with it. Just follow your plan, or you'll have to endure humiliation in your marriage.
"I just hope you will be more cautious and less reckless in your future choices, and don't repeat the same mistakes. When choosing a marriage, choose the right person, and when choosing a man, choose someone with a reliable personality. It's always right to listen to your parents' opinions.". In fact, there is nothing wrong with what kind of marriage you choose. The key is to be able to control, manage, and withstand it yourself, and feel happy from it, rather than full of pain and hurt.
