At the age of 28, she had a long relationship. Now, she has met her favorite boyfriend and they are getting along very happily. But her boyfriend told her that he has a very serious virginity plot, and he is also a virgin.
I am 28 years old this year and have been stubbornly pursuing a marriage with love for many years. Until I met him.
We appreciate and like each other, everything is so tacit. Although we have only been together for more than a month, we have all told our family and friends seriously, and also talked about marriage.
Until the night before he took me back to my hometown before the Chinese New Year, we had a long conversation all night. When it comes to past relationships, I candidly tell him that I once had a 6-year relationship starting from high school. But those have already passed, and I attribute them to immaturity and have also gained growth. However, he kept asking me if I had had any relationship with a boy.
He also told me that although he is 32 years old, he is still a virgin.
After that, there was no sleep all night.
The next day, we can all see each other's pain. He told me that he understood the problem was with him, and I was not wrong. But rational yet feel that his psychological state cannot give me a lifelong commitment. So it takes time to think carefully.
He understands that we like each other, but he is also afraid. Firstly, he is afraid that one day when my first love stands in front of him, he cannot face it; The second is that he is afraid that we will get married, and he will easily cheat because I am not a virgin. Thirdly, he is afraid that when his friends chat and talk about these topics, he will not be able to face them calmly.
I feel very hopeless, knowing the direction of happiness, but unable to move forward. I can't even say or do anything. I told him that my previous mistake was due to immaturity, but it doesn't mean I'm not careful or serious about relationships. Why live in the past, and why not cherish the present and future?
I know this happiness is not easy won, so I don't want to give up easily. I really love him and can feel his love. I want to help him overcome such psychological barriers, but it seems that everything I do is useless. What should I do with his serious virgin plot? Is such a man worth loving? Sina netizen: qq9120227
Host: If a person is timid, there will be more taboos and demands
My girlfriend is not a virgin, and he has three fears: fear of himself, fear of the future, and fear of outsiders. So your relationship became problematic due to his fear. Although you don't want to give up, the final solution still depends on whether he can open his heart.
When a person is timid, there are more taboos and demands. It would be great if you could help him overcome this psychological barrier. But if it really can't help, giving up is nothing. Because you have been pursuing a marriage with love for many years. Even if he says he loves you very much, but he is afraid of it, this love is also discounted. Never mind.
Is that right?
(Intern Editor: Cai Junyi)