Your other half is working, and as soon as you see his cup is empty, will you quickly go and refill it with water? He needs to take medication. Do you keep his medication within his reach, or do you constantly urge him to think of you when he sees it?
Do you always buy him a lot of clothes when he comes back from a business trip, whether he likes it or not, and ask him to wear them all? If you insist that this is just an expression of love and there is no need to make a fuss, then you may be implementing caring coercion towards the man you love!
Undoubtedly, women are becoming increasingly independent and dominant in sexual relationships, as evidenced by the growth rate of sibling relationships. And many men no longer believe that finding a wife who is stronger than themselves is shameless. They are willing to rely on women in life, emotions, and even finances.
And this dependence will definitely bring a strong sense of satisfaction to women. The more they rely, the more satisfied they become. Little did they know that they have already fallen into the trap of "caring coercion". In the end, whether he needs it or not, you cannot refuse to give it! OCD is attacking!
1. What is obsessive-compulsive care disorder?
The original English word is "Co dependency", which originally means interactive dependency, referring to relying on others' dependence on oneself. It refers to a person who always consciously or unconsciously provides care and assistance that others do not need, thus preventing others from solving and solving problems alone.
When his meticulous care is relied on by others, he will be self satisfied with this achievement and value, satisfied with the moral superiority obtained through it, otherwise there will be a stronger sense of self blame and pain. Excessive care for others is actually 'a need for oneself for others'.
2. Where does the compulsion of care come from?
Both men and women have had this experience when they were young. Your parents always thought that wearing less clothes in winter would be too cold, and in summer they would think that running two more steps would be too hot;
Habitually making bedding for you in the school dormitory; Your mother knows your favorite dish of stewed beef with potatoes, but she still asks every time, 'Is it delicious?' This kind of excessive care and indulgence is a source!
On the other hand, the extreme impact is that in childhood, she often gets beaten and scolded, or if the family is incomplete, it will make her "emotional pool" unsatisfied. As she grows up, she will project the emotional needs she wants to meet onto her partner or child, and make up for her emotional deficiencies and needs by overly satisfying others.
3. Why are women more likely to develop?
The latest data shows that nearly 85% of women in the United States suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder, especially among mature and independent women.
No matter how strong women are, society always positions them as "caregivers", requiring women to "have more love", which leads to women deliberately strengthening their position as "caregivers" and taking meticulous care of all aspects of men's lives, thereby weakening their own needs.
Of course, when it comes to excessive care from parents, we can naturally understand it as "a pitiful parent's heart". Unfortunately, no man will use the "pitiful wife's heart" mentality to understand your excessive care.
On the contrary, men may feel at a loss under your excessive care. They may feel stressed out because they are embarrassed to refuse your excessive kindness, and even feel inferior and worried because they gradually lose their ability to live independently due to their dependence on you