In family education, the more fathers participate, the better their children will achieve in school and are more likely to succeed in society. Why is this happening? There are significant gender differences between men and women, and the more fathers participate, the more complementary they are to their mothers, making up for the bias in women's education.
Mothers influence their children with their unique femininity, carefulness, and gentleness. They give their children a lot of care and care through storytelling, singing, and playing with toys, which are invaluable. However, the lack of male education often causes children to exhibit characteristics such as sentimentality, cowardice, timidity, isolation, and inferiority complex. Male education makes up for these shortcomings. Men are often characterized by tenacity, boldness, decisiveness, self-confidence, forthrightness, and independence, which are slightly weaker for women, indicating the irreplaceable role of male education.
What are the benefits of taking care of children?
First of all, when it comes to how to educate children, fathers are more "knowledgeable" than mothers
Most mothers have high expectations for their children, but in actual education, mothers often appear unplanned. But fathers who prefer to take care of their children at home have a stronger purpose in educating their children. Fathers generally have a plan for cultivating their children's qualities and developing their talents, while mothers are less skilled in this area.
Secondly, in terms of educational content
The knowledge of fathers is also relatively broader than that of mothers, and fathers tend to be better at mothers in history, geography, and philosophy. Therefore, fathers tell their children more about historical stories, local customs, heroes, and so on. Mothers generally tell fairy tales to their children, involving less history, geography, and philosophy. This is slightly inferior in broadening children's horizons and enriching their knowledge.
On the third education method
Fathers generally encourage their children to do things by themselves, while mothers prefer to help their children do what they can; Fathers generally have a strong attitude towards unreasonable demands made by their children, while mothers often have a soft heart. Father takes his children to the streets, watching more and eating less snacks; A mother takes her child to the street and doesn't see much, but she eats a lot of snacks.
Fourth, physical fitness
Don't keep it clean
Therefore, children often have a supportive attitude towards playing with soil and digging sand. British scientists have found that children who are too clean are not good for their health, and their research concludes that "dirty" children are healthier. This is because if a person is too clean and rarely touches bacteria and viruses, they cannot produce antibodies in the body. Once a large number of bacteria invade, they will be knocked down. Therefore, "being spotless" is not a good thing for children's growth. In this way, it seems that men's relaxed attitude towards children's health issues can actually help their children's growth.
motion
Liking to take children to run, swim, rock climb, and play ball games not only cultivates children's sports habits, which are beneficial to health, but also virtually exercises their willpower.
On the cultivation of the fifth character
Mothers always want to protect their children from any harm. "They don't allow their children to participate in activities that are a bit dangerous. They always worry that their children will accidentally bump, fall, or get tired. They make their children weaker and more timid, but fathers are different.".
independent
Men like the feeling of self-reliance, so they can educate their children to be self-reliant. Fathers often do not take over the responsibility of their children, but encourage them to deal with problems independently, so there is less element of coddling their children. Sometimes the child falls down and doesn't cry, but the mother quickly runs to help the child up, patting the soil and rubbing it, forcing the child's tears to come out. "Fathers often don't like this. They will say, 'Why don't you pay attention when walking? Stand up and walk forward. I believe this time I will definitely walk well.'". The child did not cry, but stood up and walked forward, with the father clapping his hands behind him and saying, "How brave!"! How brave! Thereby filling the child with confidence.
Dare to take risks
Men like to take risks, so fathers will also appropriately encourage their children's risk-taking behavior. If a child jumps from a high platform, the mother will often criticize him severely, but this is not the case with fathers, who will extend their thumbs and say to their children, "Great!"!
Spirit of exploration
Men love adventure and often engage in exploratory activities with their children. If a child takes the toy apart, the mother often scolds him. However, fathers often disapprove, and even disassemble toys with their children to satisfy their curiosity, before teaching them to assemble them properly. In addition, fathers are more interested in new things, which can also stimulate children's interest in new things. Men generally prefer to play chess, often playing checkers, military chess, chess, and go with their children, which can cultivate their logical thinking abilities.
Hands-on ability
Compared to mothers who let their children do household chores, such as sweeping the floor and cleaning the table, fathers prefer to deal with equipment - using tools such as hammers and knives to repair things and make toys with their children, cultivating their children's versatile hands-on abilities.
Endurance
For example, difficulties, hunger, tiredness, and so on, I believe that these are inevitable experiences in life. When a child encounters these difficulties, they are not great, and they should be overcome by him. Such bad stimulation is very beneficial to the growth of children.
It's good for fathers to take care of their children, but in many families, the role of fathers is missing.
An interesting phenomenon is that most visitors to family education counseling are mothers, which indicates that there may be a phenomenon of "yin flourishing and yang declining" in educating children. In Chinese family education, 50% are mothers, 20% are fathers, and 30% are equally divided. Many dads shift the responsibility of educating their babies to their mothers, while hiding themselves in leisure. In fact, it's not good to do so.
When asked about the reasons why some fathers have faded out of family education, some answered: "I am too busy at work to take care of my children;"; Some people say that they have a bad temper and cannot be angry with their children... It seems that there are reasons for this... In fact, they have forgotten the old adage, "If you raise or not teach, it's your father's fault.".
Lack of male education can affect children's personality, emotions, willpower, and way of thinking. "Our children now receive enough maternal education, and when they are infants, they are mostly fed and cared for by their mothers."; Kindergarten education is all about female teachers; Primary and secondary school stages are also basically dominated by female teacher education; Lack of male education often causes children to exhibit characteristics such as sentimentality, cowardice, timidity, isolation, and inferiority complex. The absence of a father makes it difficult to remedy a child's personality flaws in a timely manner. When a child needs his father's guidance, he pushes the child to a helpless mother.
In the long run, if a baby feels in his heart that his father is not responsible for him and does not seek advice from him when there is something wrong, his father's authority will become lower and lower, and the child's personality defects will become increasingly difficult to remedy. Fathers are lazy and shy for a while, but they may regret it for the rest of their lives.
At this point, the author recalls that in the first "Grand House Gate", the seventh master Bai Jingqi and his wife Huang Chun gave birth to a son named Bai Jingye. When the father disciplined the child a bit harshly, Huang Chun, the mother, always took too much care of the child and said, "The child is still young," so she couldn't bear to punish him or find a way to discipline him. She only indulged in it, so she let the child escape. After Bai Jingye grew up, his character was weak and unyielding, completely different from his father. Perhaps this is precisely why.
The appropriate approach is for both parents not to coddle or be too tyrannical, to be human and principled, and to come up with a unified set of principles that must be firmly implemented.
"Father's love is like a mountain, mother's love is like a sea, and father and mother have their respective advantages in family education. Only by complementing and balancing yin and yang can they be beneficial to the growth of children.". Mothers occasionally need to let go and let fathers take more care of their children, and fathers should actively participate. In addition to making their children better, they can also make family relationships more harmonious.