Post Date December, 03 2023
How to view separation between two places?
My point of view regarding the separation between two places is that no matter how well justified, long-term separation between couples is a very unfortunate thing. If temporary separation is a form of helplessness, then long-term separation should be considered a major regret in life, and this is not a controversial issue.
Distance produces beauty is a proposition in aesthetics, which refers to the need for people to maintain a certain distance in the process of appreciating natural and artistic beauty, otherwise it will affect and weaken the aesthetic effect of the subject being viewed. The so-called "no beautiful scenery in a place where one has lived for a long time", "entering a room of sesame orchids without smelling its fragrance for a long time", "not knowing the true face of Mount Lu, only being in this mountain", all refer to aesthetic differences caused by issues such as time and location. For marriage, moderate distance can produce the beauty of marriage, which only exists in close and intimate contact, and distance has only a distancing and damaging effect on marriage. Although couples are in their respective independent positions, the degree of intimacy between them conveys different psychological feelings based on this positional relationship. The closer a couple is, the closer their positional relationship is. Positional relationship refers to the spatiotemporal distance relationship between couples.
When explaining distance issues, interpersonal relationships emphasize that people approach when friendly, and distance arises when opposed or distant. It is worth mentioning that marital relationships are the most basic interpersonal relationships. From this, it can be seen that distance can only bring distance to marriage and cannot create intimacy. In France, over 60% of couples living apart complain that distance has damaged their relationship, 40% accuse the other party of leaving too little time for themselves, and most couples living apart end their relationship after four years. Less than 10% of people hold different opinions, believing that only living separately can satisfy them and not make their partners tired. The French Association for Marriage and Family Relations conducted a detailed study on this group of people, and found that couples who are accustomed to living separately tend to be overly self centered and prefer a unique life. Most of them have defects or obstacles in parent-child relationships, and are prone to developing autism or autism in old age.
German sociologists believe that long-term separation between spouses brings three main hazards:
1. An uncontrollable sense of loneliness.
Even if the internet speed is fast, the pixels are high, and the phone bill is cheap, it can only be seen and heard, without the feeling of contact. At critical moments, when the other person is not around, the sense of loss can only be felt by lonely people. Especially on weekends, holidays, or when sick or frustrated, one can only face it alone, which can cause physical and mental exhaustion, loneliness, and helplessness on both sides;
2. Emotions fade over time and there are fewer topics to discuss.
Just like Yushan slowly fading out of Lanxin's circle of life, the content that the two can talk to becomes less and less, and the relationship gradually fades away. Both of them become relatively independent in their lives, developing a bad habit of being dictatorial towards each other, and their loved ones become the most familiar strangers;
3. It is difficult to fit physically and mentally, and one party may cheat.
Sexual life is also an indispensable part of a happy marriage. Long periods of separation between spouses artificially block the satisfaction of instinctual desires, disrupting the internal balance of marriage. When the spouse is not around, once the moral constraints are relaxed, extramarital affairs are highly likely to occur.
The sooner the separation ends, the better. As the saying goes, there must be gains and losses. If you want to have a life of reunion between husband and wife, you may have to lose some of the benefits you have already gained. Of course, the weight of gains and losses depends on the objective reality of both parties and each other's psychological endurance. Whoever loses is for the benefit of the entire family. As long as marriage is present, emotions are present, and love is present, even some losses are worth it.
