Face is not worth it, emotions are worth it

Many people ask me emotional questions, and they always mention that when they argue with their lover or other half, the two of them become deadlocked and unable to finish the argument. No one wants to compromise, so in the end, the relationship ends. I think it's normal for couples and couples to argue together. The point is, what do you get out of arguing? A good argument is also a good form of communication, allowing two people to know what the other person wants, or if there are any misunderstandings or poor communication... If the argument is over, it can help each other correct and improve, making the relationship better, and there is no harm in arguing.

But the most frightening thing is that there is a kind of lovers arguing because they are really not suitable for each other, and they insist on dragging each other down and changing each other into what you want. So, if it's really not suitable, don't argue anymore. Being together is more painful than happy, it's not a healthy love.

There is also a type of argument where one loves to argue despite having a good relationship. The more they argue, the less they understand emotional management and the lower their EQ. They impulsively say things that hurt a person's self-esteem or make you regret them in the future. Many people are stuck here, feeling that they must fight for right or wrong, win or lose, but the most important thing is to save their face.

Many people know they are at fault or have nothing to argue about, but they are stuck in face and can't put it down. Therefore, they would rather freeze there, have a cold war, say angry words that hurt others, than put down their figure to make up. They clearly love each other very much, but they use the wrong way to think that putting themselves up high and letting the other party compromise, apologize, and please is the winner in love.

They are all wrong. Because in love, the relationship you want to win (if you want this relationship) is not the unimportant right or wrong, win or lose, or save face.

I once wrote an article in a book that love doesn't have to compete for victory, it's better to apologize first if you argue!, In the article, it is written that putting on airs and saving face in front of your beloved boyfriend and girlfriend is really a boring thing. To be honest, you are just fighting for 'momentary pleasure', but what? Is it any help to your relationship? If you love him, why bother pretending face and showing off in front of him?

You really just won face and lost inside. You won face, but did you win emotions? If you care about him or you love him, take away the 'face'. The other person will truly love and respect you, not because you have more face, but because you are willing to give up your face for him or her.

So, someone asked, what if I apologize first but the other party is clearly wrong? My approach is to apologize first, make the other person feel good, ease each other's emotions and atmosphere, and then wait until the anger has passed before communicating with them to discuss the issue of right or wrong about this incident. To avoid arguing in anger and causing the other party to become angry and irreparable.

I truly believe that if you truly love someone and care about their feelings, then face is really not important at all. To be practical, is face worth it? Can noodles be eaten? Why do you care so much about something that doesn't help you or your relationship at all?

Of course, if the other party is really wrong, you don't have to bow your head or feel aggrieved. If this relationship is really not worth it or not, then face is even less important, because if the other person is no longer important to you, why do you still care so much?

Many people will persist in being right or wrong, believing that no matter what, they must be the right or winning side. Of course, you may really be right, and you will definitely win with emotion and reason. However, you are not a judge sitting in court or a lawyer accepting a case. You are not trying a person or a relationship, but rather, you are managing a relationship. What you need to consider is not the right or wrong win or loss in front of you, but whether you want this relationship or not, and how do you go about it? If you take a long-term perspective, you will feel that being fixated on right or wrong is not important at all.

Like the article I once wrote, when you argue, what is your purpose first?, If you want to, stick to what you're right and what he's wrong, and then leave him. Otherwise, don't argue about the right or wrong in front of you, and work hard for two people to last.

But many people want to argue about right or wrong, win or lose, prove that the other party is wrong, and then want to be with the other party. Think about it, isn't it very contradictory? If you really think he is outrageously wrong, why should you sentence him, argue, and then be with him again? Aren't you hitting yourself?

I think that when two people are together, no matter what problems occur, each other has mistakes, and everyone will make mistakes. As long as this mistake is not serious and can be improved, we must learn to tolerate and accept. As long as we love and cherish each other, we can learn from each other's mistakes and become better together. This is the way to manage our relationship.

Faced with the other half's mistakes, there is no need to scold or humiliate them with a straight face, but rather to communicate with them by expressing one's thoughts with a straight face. I think being able to suppress one's emotions even when angry, take a step back, and express one's dissatisfaction calmly and reasonably is actually a very wise and magnanimous cultivation.

We strive to become a more mature person by learning to control our emotions and become a higher EQ person? So, when we face the people we love, can we also strive to become more mature and considerate people who speak without hurting others? If we love him, why should we hurt him?

Whenever there is an argument between me and my partner, I will strive to be someone who does not speak ill or hurt others. I would rather think twice before acting, and think for three more seconds before speaking. You will definitely thank yourself for your decision in the future. I would rather hold back my emotions and not say much or argue at the moment. I want to be someone who calms down the situation first. Then adjust your attitude and communicate. I know it's not easy, but since I want to maintain this marriage, I need to learn to be a more mature person, not just a scolding and noisy woman. If I do, I will hate myself.

I love him, so I am willing to give him face. I am willing to make him the winner right now, and I don't want to argue or say unreasonable things in anger. So I am willing to let you not fight for that useless face, you really just won face, lost the inside. Do you have to think about winning face and emotions? If not, why do we care about being useless and just trying to make ourselves happy?

Love someone, so we are willing to let go of our physique and posture, not because we are weaker, but because we have greater magnanimity and breadth of mind to make someone we love. We are willing to give face to him, maintain the face of our other half, and even in disputes, leave face to him, not to argue for superiority.

If he loves and cherishes you, he will thank you for giving him face. Sometimes, if you take a step back, it may seem like you have lost some, but later on, you will win more respect and love.

If you love him, give him face, you will make him, you will know how to be a more mature and rational person. Face is not worth it, emotions are worth it. isn't it?