Post Date December, 03 2023
Netizens confide:
I am 24 years old and work as a civil servant in a company. Recently, I was transferred to the logistics department as a cashier due to a job transfer. My colleagues in the logistics department are all from Shenyang. During my time as a cashier, I met a client from Northeast China. At first, he often came to our stall to play. At first, I didn't speak to him, but later, he often came to me and I met him. Talking to him feels like he's not bad. Later on, I often go out to play occasionally, and I have some feelings for him. Maybe it's my gap time.
"I didn't fall in love for two years after graduation, so I tried to socialize with him because I was curious about sex, so I had sex with him for the first time.". "I'm not a person with a virgin complex, either. Later, I moved in together, and after living together, I realized that he originally had a girlfriend.". Every time that woman called when he was with me, he wouldn't answer the phone, or just hung up in a hurry when he did, so he hired me. In fact, I only dated that girlfriend in Shenyang a month ago, and I had a relationship with that girl after meeting her several times. I was completely confused when I heard about it.
"I never imagined that I would be a third party. Every time I heard his phone ring, I was very scared. I was afraid that it was her phone. Perhaps it was due to a lack of heart. I was always telling myself that as long as he left Hainan in the second half of the year, I would leave him immediately.". He also often takes me to play with his friends, who all know that he has a girlfriend, and may not be surprised that I am with him. And they all say that he is a playboy who has a car and a house in Shenyang. "The conditions at home are good, he is an old man, and he is also very charming. In the end, when we argue, it's me who coaxs him, so he won't be angry. If I get tough, he won't pay attention to me.".
He was planning to open a bar here, but the renovation ultimately exceeded the budget by a lot, so he borrowed money everywhere. At that time, he asked me if I had any. I just gave him 5000 yuan and he promised to pay it back to me. A few days before the bar was about to open, he suddenly told me that his girlfriend from Shenyang was coming over. In a fit of anger, I stopped living with him that day and no longer contacted him. But on the opening day of his bar, he actually sincerely asked me to go, saying that I must go. I don't know what mindset he was based on, and I knew I would see him with her when I went. Maybe I really wanted to let myself go. I really went.
Seeing them both together and loving each other, he treated me like a regular friend. I didn't stay for a few minutes before I left. Later, from the bottom of my heart, I didn't want to talk to him anymore, nor did I want him to pay me back any more money. But one night in the early morning when I was staying at a hotel, I was harassed by one of our superiors. I was so scared that I called him and he came over in ten minutes. Later, when I saw that I didn't have to leave, I said I was leaving. I also knew that he was afraid of that woman, and I didn't keep him. "I guess I can't be a lover or an enemy anyway, so I won't blame him anymore. Sometimes when he calls me to inquire about things, I also treat him as a general friend.".
"We met before he returned to Shenyang, and he seemed very unhappy about smoking there. He said he was very calm and depressed to see me. When he went home, he saw me online and said he was sorry for me, saying I was too kind to him.". "When he was here, I helped him clean up his room, wash his clothes, and take care of everything. He said he felt guilty about me, and later we got together online.". I usually talk a lot on the Internet, but he seldom says. On Qixi Day, I asked him to call me, and he did. I promised to call me once before, but I didn't call me. His phone number is set, so it's difficult to call. I can't find him unless he finds me.
He called me at about 10:30. When we talked online that morning on Qixi, he said that he would not go out with that Shenyang woman. I was very happy to hear that, but I didn't believe him after thinking about it. It's impossible to tell if he called me after dating that woman. He doesn't like wearing condoms when he's with me. "But I am a very attentive person, and this is the first time I have been with a man, so I asked him to bring it with me. I said what to do if I have a child, and he said to remarry if I have a child.". "He is 29 years old, but he said he doesn't want to get married. He said why should he get married? Many of his friends got married without any good results.".
One time, he was urged by his parents to have a child for him, and I talked to him, but I wondered how it could be. He and I all disappeared from chatting online, just waiting for him on the internet every day. Once I got angry, he said he couldn't always chat with me online. He will come again in November this year, and we will be together again after he comes, but I want to leave this place and stay away from him. "I want to let go of the right person. He really can't give me a sense of security, but I'm reluctant to leave him. People around me don't want me to be with him, which is unrealistic. Do you think it's okay to do this?"?
Expert response:
Everyone and women feel that they can give everything for love. When you give everything, they always expect a return, and the expectation of no return is the same for everyone. Love one and then wait for another, and they will feel unrealistic. Some men don't care about your past, but they can't bring the past to another man.
When a man is next to another woman, she feels the same way as you do, and he won't answer your phone calls, and he'll always lie to you. There is nothing wrong with a man's flirtatiousness. It's your fault to make a man flirtatious. If you don't get it, you should give up. If you partner with others in business, there will always be a day when you break up. Don't make yourself worthless.
Don't think you can tolerate love, it's just that you haven't met a better man yet, and sharing love with a woman won't hurt anyone.
(Intern Editor: Cai Junyi)
