Post Date December, 03 2023
Recently, a woman in Changsha, Hunan Province, who refused to marry her son due to dissatisfaction with her newly married daughter-in-law for three months, climbed to the 10th floor and jumped out of a building in a huff. Finally, it was all saved by firefighters.
Event Review
Newly Married Daughter-in-law Refuses to Jump from a Building
It is understood that the woman who jumped from the building was surnamed Qin. At that time, she was emotional on the terrace on the 10th floor and kept crying, saying she was about to jump. After being rescued by firefighters, she pointed out that her 32 year old son met a woman surnamed Zhang last March and got married in October. However, after marriage, the daughter-in-law refused to let her son touch her hand. "When we got married, the master of ceremonies said we wanted to kiss, and she wouldn't either!" Half a month after marriage, she shared rooms with her husband on the grounds that he snored too loudly. After that, she refused to reconcile with her husband and said that if he needed, he could go outside and ask for a young lady to give him.
Ms. Qin and her son suspected of being cheated into marriage by Zhang, requested a divorce from Zhang, and received a gift of 80000 yuan. In a subsequent interview, Zhang explained that she refused to share a room with her husband because she was recovering from illness. After leaving the husband's home, she received many abusive phone calls. She expressed her willingness to negotiate a divorce, and as for the gift money, she had to "see how the court decides, we will refund the money as we decide.".
Emotional Analysis
Children's marriage does not require the elderly to "threaten with death"
Generations of Chinese people have generally believed that their lives are "boring, uninteresting, and powerless." This temperament has also deeply influenced our love. This "three nothings" phenomenon is largely due to parental interference. Things like this in which mother-in-law coerces her son and daughter-in-law with death to "help" their son and daughter-in-law round the house may seem extreme, but it also reflects that Chinese parents still have a deep degree of interference in their children's marriage.
Wang Qinghua, director of Qingdao Weiqing Marriage Consultation Center, has been engaged in marriage consultation and divorce litigation for many years. According to her experience, the "overstepping the throne" of the elderly on both sides is becoming increasingly prominent in the marriage of the post 80s generation. Wang Qinghua said that he once encountered a case in which a mother-in-law even prescribed the number of times and methods of sexual activity for young couples per week to his son-in-law, which made him very unacceptable and he filed for a divorce. What is even more surprising is that over the years, Wang Qinghua has discovered that "in the past, it was parents who helped their children arrange weddings, but now more and more parents arrange divorces, accounting for about half of them." When couples after the 1980s have disputes and other marital chores, the elderly of both sides also frequently participate in family wars, which to some extent intensifies conflicts. Wang Qinghua believes that marital disputes cannot be avoided, and the elderly on both sides should rationally resolve this issue, giving young couples more room to solve their problems.
Wang Qinghua also stated that excessive parental interference cannot be separated from the "incompetence" of their children. Nowadays, young people are overly dependent on their parents and habitually "complain" to their parents about their shortcomings. When parents listen, no one wants their "baby" to be wronged, and when they get together, it's inevitable to criticize them directly or laterally. It's better when you're calm. If you're angry, excessive parental involvement not only won't have a positive effect, but it can turn a small conflict into irreconcilable differences.
Data Speaking
Men listen more to their parents than women
The 2014 Chinese Marriage Survey Report just released by Baihe.com shows that about 30% of single people have failed romantic experiences due to parental interference. Among them, 33.5% of single men suffer from emotional failure due to their parents, which is slightly higher than 27.4% of women, indicating that men are more likely to be influenced by their parents' opinions or suggestions.
In a survey sponsored by Fenghuang.com with the theme "How do you think parents interfere with their children's marital and sexual life?", 3.1% of people chose to "understand, after all, parents lived in a more traditional era and had rich experience. They only used their past experience to guide us"; Up to 71.9% of netizens choose to "vary from person to person, most of the time still respect their parents' opinions, but occasionally have their own marital and sexual lifestyle"; "25% of netizens choose not to understand that once married, they should no longer be subject to the control of their parents, not to mention their own sexual life, which should be decided by themselves and cannot be compromised."
