Post Date December, 02 2023
We have been married for almost three years, and now that our daughter is 13 months old, I can't figure it out. They are all born in the 1980s. I'm 85 years old, and she's 87 years old. How can I feel like my 26 year old wife's body is becoming more and more like an old lady in conversation.
My wife is 1.6 meters tall. When I first met her in a romantic relationship, she weighed 116 pounds. Since giving birth to the baby, she has stopped breastfeeding and is not paying attention to weight loss. She now weighs over 120 pounds, with fat on her waist in circles, a small belly, thick thighs and buttocks, and a thick neck. She has a double chin, giving people the feeling that my wife is so strong.
I am 172cm, weighing only 130 pounds. I often tell her to eat less meat, pay attention to weight loss, and look slimmer and more beautiful. She just says that I dislike her, that I am a pervert, that I am abnormal... nagging endlessly, like an old mother, in short, she still likes snacks, ham sausages, and meat. Hey, have you ever seen such a wife?
As a husband and wife, I shouldn't have criticized her like this, but she really doesn't pay attention to her image. Every day before going to work and going out, she dresses up seriously and looks a bit more comfortable. When she comes home, especially on weekends, she casually takes a hairpin and clips her hair, puts on pajamas and slippers, and sways around the house. Her parents in law are all at home, and she doesn't pay attention to her image. The most unbearable thing is that when we first met and started dating, She is still very reserved. Now they are in bed, farting loudly, as if they were intentionally making such a loud noise. Is it true that a woman is married with this kind of face?
Also, have you ever seen a 26 year old woman who nags all day? Are women from the north like this? They hang their mouths on men all day, saying I'm not ambitious, I don't care about her, I'm too easily satisfied, and I feel too good about myself... A while ago, I entered the QQ space of my ex girlfriend in college. Although she is also married in Shenzhen, she doesn't have children, but her figure, clothing, temperament, and even my wife are really in a few different grades!
Reply:
From the modern marriage perspective of mutual attraction and mutual need, your marriage is not bad because you also need her to lose weight and pay attention to her image, while she needs you to be more motivated, work harder, and earn more money back. The key is that you can fulfill these needs for each other. So, as long as you meet each other's needs, the marital relationship will become harmonious.
Your attention is still on each other, which is a good thing, but because of this, you cannot attract each other. You reject her so much that it makes you miss your college girlfriend who abandoned you. She does not reject you but is not attracted to you. She has no motivation to dress you up and has a blue temperament.
From a different perspective, it's also a good thing that your wife is becoming more and more like an old lady, indicating that she has no intention of cheating and wants to live with peace of mind. If you focus more on your work, she will appreciate you, respect you, and feel a sense of crisis when she sees that you have a future. She will automatically go on weight loss, and she won't nag like that, so naturally you won't reject her so much.
It's you who's feeling uneasy now. Do you need to reflect on your motivation to marry her? Is it because you love her or because she treats you well? From her demands on you, it can be seen that you are an incompetent man, and nine out of ten incompetent men are unable to marry the woman they love, and the quality of your marriage can only be like this.
(Intern Editor: Lai Jiaxing)
